The One I Let Go

Consequences

"What'd you say when you saw her?" Nicki shrugs at the curious woman seated across from her. 'The Incident,' as she's started calling it, happened about a week ago, and no matter how hard she tried, she could not escape it.

"I just lost it, like I couldn't believe I was seeing her again after all these years, I wanted to hug her, but at the same time I wanted to punch her in her mouth, ya know?" The woman nods understandingly, Candi had been Nicki's friend since way before she met Robyn. She was there for Nicki through the tough few months after Robyn had left. She knew about the whole situation, and she was one of the rare people that Nicki could confide in about the whole situation.

"But look, girl, I'm not tryna think about it too much, it is what it is..." Nicki shrugs, hoping that Candi will get the hint and drop it.

"Girl I guess if that's what you wanna do, but all imma say is, I think you need to take her up on her offer and go talk that shit out." Nicki rolls her eye, "and why in the hell would I do some shit like that?"

" its so fucking obvious that what that girl did fucked you up, you need to make your peace so you can move on."

"I've already made my peace and I don't wanna talk about this shit no more it's over."

Candi raises her hands in defeat, "whatever you say girl... Anyway, this is my first time seeing you in moths, we gotta go out tonight and turn up, and you can't say no with your lame ass."

"Fuck you bitch, and no I'm fucking exhausted I don't wanna go out and have all these lame ass dudes all up on me."

"Uh, yes you do bitch.I know you'll die before you admit that you're still pressed over Rob but it's so obvious. You haven't been with anyone since Meek and that was like a year ago."

"So? I don't need a relationship to be happy, I'm not pressed over Rob bitch, I'm just not looking for a relationship right now."

"Who said anything about a relationship, You haven't had sex since meek and you've been more angry snapping at everyone and shit, you need to go out and get laid babe." Nicki lets out a loud cackle, "Girl bye you're tripping." She stands from her couch making her way to her bedroom, with Candi hot on her heels.

"Come on Nick, if not for you then come out for me. I'm your best friend and how often do we get to see each other?" Nicki stops at the bottom of her staircase sighing in defeat.

"Fine bitch I will go out with you, but I can't stay out that late, I got a shoot tomorrow okay?" Candi squeals in excitement, "whatever you say bitch, now move." She says pushing Nicki out of the way and sprinting up the staircase, "You got a pair of Louboutins that have just been calling my name." Nicki groans quickly following after her, "bitch leave my shit alone." Candi's loud laugh echoes throughout the house.

If there is one thing Candi was right about is that Nicki did need to get laid. She knew it and the people who had to deal with her cranky ass knew it too. Being a successful woman with trust issues was damn hard. Not only did she have very little time to think about things like relationships and sex, after being hurt by Robyn it was difficult to even think about letting anyone else in for fear of the same thing happening all over again. She knew it was affecting her work, she'd walk on sets and already be on ten, snapping at her team demanding every little detail be perfect. She was all around a lot tenser.

She had started modeling because it was fun and it took her mind off what was going on in her reality, and those things are still true but now there was an added stress. And, seeing Robyn again didn't make the situation any better.

Nicki could not fucking lie, Rob looked good as hell. Her look was one of the first things that attracted Nicki to her, those exotic green eyes, the beautiful thick hair, and her style. Then she actually got the chance to know her and found that she was smart, ambitious and that all she wanted to do was take care of her own. It did still hurt Nicki because the truth was she had never fallen out of love. Yeah, she had been with someone after Robyn but, that relationship didn't work out long because she found herself constantly comparing him to Robyn. Nicki is the type of person that if she can't put her all into it, there's no point in doing it. So, she ended that relationship and now here she was, to this day still madly in love with the woman who broke her heart.