Enigmatic - Divergent/Eric Fanfiction

Chapter Twenty-One

The next few days consisted of going through our fear landscapes again. We each had an hour in the landscape room with an instructor, they rotated shifts every three hours and I'd been lucky to have Four twice, and Isla once. We'd do one simulation at a time, and if I passed through them quickly, Four would allow me to do more. I managed to get through four on the first day, then Isla allowed me to go after doing two on the second day, stating that it was too much hassle having to stick a needle in my neck. It had been a little difficult to allow Isla to inject the serum because although I did trust her, I only really felt comfortable with Four doing it. He'd done it right from the start, and I'd only improved with this fear because of his capability to calm me down and take no shit from me.

Today Four had brought a different serum so I went through five simulations in a row without having to stop to inject me again. Over the last few days I'd experienced heights and being pinned down and injected with painful substances again, as well as drowning, being buried alive, and a very, very nasty one which was an awful reminder of James.

Today, I had it again.

I was in an apartment that looked like Lu's, when I was flung onto the bed. As I rolled over to reveal who it was that had pushed me, I found James leering over me, that same sadistic grin on his face. He grabbed me and attempted to pull my shirt up, but I pushed him away. Normally I'd have been able to attack him back, and be out of this particular simulation by now, but I couldn't get away. My actions only ever seemed to make him angrier, and the more I struggled, the more he hurt me. Eventually I just gave up, tried to blank it out, but it was hard. I told myself that I could open my eyes at any second, and I'd be back in the room with Four. I'd be safe. God, I even wished that Four could drag me out of the simulation himself. Anything would be better than having to experience this.

It didn't stop, I could still feel James' hands on my body, and I felt violently sick. I willed it to stop, squeezing my eyes shut so tightly that it hurt, my nails digging into my palms where my fists were clenched.

Suddenly, my eyes fluttered open and I was back in the landscape room, breathing heavily. Tears filled my eyes and I sank down onto my knees, leaning towards the floor as a sob erupted from within me.

"Jac?" Four's voice was quieter than normal, and I sobbed again as I remembered that he'd been able to see it all.

He slowly approached and bent down beside me. "It wasn't real. James is still dead."

I sniffed, and tried to blink back the tears, but they felt uncontrollable.

"Jac, it was a hallucination." He told me.

"I can't do it. I can't do the test tomorrow, not if that's going to be in it." I mumbled.

He sighed. "You have to."

I shook my head as more tears fell from my eyes. "No, I cant!" I cried, and looked up at him.

His face was void of any emotion, except the frown furrowing his brows. "Do you want to be Factionless?"

I shook my head again.

"Well there you go. It's face this fear one more time, and if you're lucky it'll be last, or become Factionless." He said as he stood up.

My bottom lip quivered, and I pursed my lips to stop it.

"Come on." He held his hand out to me, and I slowly took it. He pulled me to my feet. "Go back to the accommodation and calm down. Hopefully you'll see sense."

I nodded and slowly walked towards the door. I didn't want to go back to the accommodation. I'd have to face people, and all I wanted was to be alone.