The Power Of A Teenage Prayer

Chapter 8: Lord Help Me Be Free From Peer Pressure

I once Heard A Radio Interview With some Gang members in Los angeles, where I used to live. At that time,crime was extremely high in that city because of a terrifying wave of random drive-by shootings and murders committed by gangs. The talk show host was interviewing these boys,some barely teenagers and some in their early twenties. They said that the main reason they joined their gang was to have a sense of belongings. In bone-chilling state-ments,a number of the boys admitted they would do whatever it took to be accepted and respected by the group. Even commit murder.

Some of the boys revealed that the main test of wheather they could be accepted into the gang was to go out and kill someone. Anyone. The murder was entirely random. There was no other reason for the murder other than to complete the initiation requirement and prove that they would do anything for the group. Some of the boys being interviewed confessed that they hated doing that and wished there had been another way to become a member. But they were so desperate to belong to a family of people where they felt accepted that they went ahead with it. This was a frightening revelation to all of us who lived there because it meant no place was safe.

Around at that same time,a friend of ours was out in front of his own home in a broad daylight when he was approached by two young boys. They were walking down the streets, which was in a very nice and a quiet residential neighbourhood,when one of the boys pulled out a gun and short our friend point-black. There was no robbery or attempt to commit any other crime, and the boys fled away on foot. Our friend live through it, but the damage to his body greatly affected his ability to do the work he was an expert in doing, and it took him years to recover.

It was obvious that these young boys in the interview had no sense of purpose for their lives outside of belonging to a gang. Most of them were raised without fathers, and in some cases the mother was absent too. I'm sure that if each of them would have had a strong sense of family,and love and acceptance from other people,they would never have chosen this destructive lifestyle.

This story illustrates how desperately people need other people. And how much they need the Lord. Everybody needs to feel accepted. We all desperately need a sense of family,of relationship,of belongings. If you don't realize that about yourself,it's probably because you have always had that. God created us to be in families. We have a natural hunger to be part of something that gives us a sense of acceptance,affirmation,and being needed and appreciated. But teenagers feel that more strongly than people of any other age. When young people are deprived of good,healthy,godly,supportive relationship,they will seek ones that aren't. That's how they get in with the wrong crowd. That's how gangs are formed.

The Rules Of Acceptance
As a Teenager,the feeling of acceptance by your peers is one of the most important thing in your Life. Not recognizing that need for acceptance can get you in to trouble if you don't realize how strong social pressure can be at your age. I dont think it is ever as strong at any other time of life.

The unwritten social rules for teenagers are often very strict,and peers can be cruel and intolerant when someone violates those rules. For example,in some places a violation of this social structure happens if a person isn't wearing the right thing from the right place and doesn't look a certain way. Not looking the "accepted way" can keep that person from being accepted in the stratosphere of the elite. Or if a person doesn't act a certain way,accomplish certain things,or have certain abilities,they may not be accepted by a particular group. Adults experience some of that too,but they have the freedom to find their niche in life and be where they are most comfortable. Teenagers don't usually have that freedom. They have to make the best of where they are and who they are with. And that can be very difficult.

Being accepted is a big issue,and not feeling accepted can be the root of many problems in a young person's Life. Any sense of rejection can be devastating,and the memory of it can torture someone for years to come. Whether or not you are accepted by other people's influences how you feel about yourself and your life. Not being accepted by the people you want to be accepted by can make you feel like you have to try and be accepted by other people who may not be at all reflective of who you really are. That's what happened to those gang members who were interviewed. The things the gang leaders required of them was not something they wanted to do,but their desire to be accepted was stronger than their sense of right and wrong.