Every Rose Needs The Rain Sometime

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Over time I had been healing and I was feeling so much better it was about a month and I had been back to writing music, I was dancing again in other artist music videos, I was also in anger management I realized how out of control my temper was getting other than that I was pretty lowkey, eventually people got the hint Prince and I were broken up considering they were seeing less of us tigether and more od him sporting that homewrecker around town. I just kinda avoided any types of social media for a while and laid back. I was sitting on my couch laying back with Cleo while Daisy was off somewhere doing who knows what and Carmen was on the chair across from me watching my tv. I was writing music on my notepad when I was feeling light headed and sick..I didn't know what was wrong with me for the past few weeks I thought it was my stress at first but now that I've been doing my own thing and getting use to the way things were I thought I would be better by now.  I couldn't focus so I just put my notes down "I'm gonna make something to eat want anything?" "nahh" I got up almost falling over "woahh" I was so dizzy and felt so nauseous "Ro are you good?" I shook my head no "you need to go to the doctor you've been dealing with these symptoms for who knows how long what if there is something seriously wrong.." I sighed I really was getting sick of going to the hospital..but I had to make sure my health was ok. "Okay fine" we got on our shoes and she grabbed her keys and we left to the hospital. I was sitting in the hospital bed "ughh Im ready to go, im hungry!" "can you just be patient they just want to check over everything and make sure your ok" I sat back closing my eyes waiting..

I heard a knock on the door before a doctor finally entered.."Okay Rose so we looked over everything and we found out what the problem is.." I sighed I was now nervous I didn't think something was actually gonna be wrong "okay im ready.. how long do I have" "7 months....." I dropped my head..."your two months pregnant congratulations" my jaw dropped I was in shock there is no way I know my body I can't be..." but that is impossi--" I cut myself off thinking about everything ..it was all adding up now..how could I not see this..I guess my mind was so oblivious to the thought of having a baby abytime soon that I didn't think it could actually happen to me. I honestly didn't know how to feel...what was Prince going to say..was it best I just didn't say anything. "I will get your discharge papers congratulations" the doctor walked out and carmen covered her mouth and ran over hugging me "oh my goshh your pregnant congratulations..!" I gave a half smile..I put my clothes back on and we headed out to eat. I bit down on my lip thinking about everything as I looked out the window. "Rose what's the matter you've been quiet and haven't said a word since we left the hospital aren't you happy" "To be honest Carmen I don't know...I never expected or planned on having kids any time soon..and when I did I definitely didn't wanna do it alone..I wanted a family" "and your baby is going to have that...me,you..that's all you need when I first got pregnant with trey I was scared and alone--" "but you had a mom" "yes but still that doesn't change anything I wanted Trey to have a father in life but he doesn't and we're doing just fine.." "It's not just that I don't know what i'm doing Carmen maybe I should just..get an ab--" "DONT YOU DARE that is a blessing out of every situation there is a blessing...I will help you it'lll be ok" I took a deep breath I just wasn't feeling good my body just wasn't feeling it. Right as im getting over Prince and I here pops up something he's always wanted..I just don't know if he wants it from me right anymore..or honestly if I wanted to with him.

-----------------------------------Another month later------------------

I decided on keeping the baby ..Carmen has been such a help to me and I was so happy to have her in my life...she's been helping me build the nursery and because I didn't know what I was having yet we just kept the colors neutral.