Heart-Talk

Hello 2018

- The bravest thing i've done lately is to be honest. Imagine that, saying what you are thinking to someone's face. Some ppl do this so naturally and to me it's absolutely wild. I've pretty much never spoken from the heart instinctually. It's always the thing that scares me, the thing I avoid. I wanna be cool, I wanna be distant, I want to be controlled. I want to understand and discuss. I never want to express. Unless i am alone and in a safe place where no one can see my face, then i can cry and process and release the emotions I held in all day. But lately i am actually saying it. I'm letting the internal become external. I'm telling the truth and its hard and messy to speak up and try and put in the effort but it's so worth it. Not everyone is going to understand you right away or see your side but it's worth to explain. I feel like I've crossed to another dimension. Who's this girl? Who is saying the words i hear coming out of my mouth?? Who is making these plans to be around ppl and be myself?? Hahaha I don't know her but i like her and i have big plans for her in 2018. The time has come. No more hiding. No more keeping everything in. Sharing myself with the people around me has felt scarier but also never better. Life needs to be live and i am here just to do that. 👅🌚🎉
HAPPY NEW YEAR!