his shield

026

smut warning~

jaehwan cries himself to sleep that night. what made it worse was how he wouldn't let me hold him. he wouldn't let me comfort him.

i just later beside him and watched the ceiling in the dark as i heard him sobbing beside me.

it took hours but he eventually cried himself to sleep.

as per usual i didn't sleep a wink but i spent the whole night worrying about jaehwan.

i didn't want him to find out like this. i was planning to tell him eventually but i was waiting for the right time to do so.

i can't believe that hongbin just took the reigns like that and told jaehwan a truth which affects our whole relationship.

i hope for hongbin's sake that he isn't there where i return to the institute.

i see the sun peeking through the windows and i kick down my part of the blankets and get out of bed.

jaehwan sleeps heavily as i head in to take a shower. i turn on the water and slowly throw my clothes to the floor as the water heats slowly.

i stand beneath the steaming water and begin to wash myself as i contemplate how i'm going to approach hongbin.

i shouldn't outright punch him. that would be childish. i need to think about this with a clear mind.

suddenly i hear the bathroom door open. i turn and curse beneath my breath when i see jaehwan standing before me.

i didn't close the shower door as i wasn't expecting anyone to be coming in while i was in here.

i just hold eye contact for a while before i turn, remembering that i am naked.

jaehwan begins to discard his pyjamas and soon i feel his arms snake around my waist.

i tense slightly but i quickly relax and continue to wash my hair. he just holds onto me as i do so.

"if you die again, i won't be able to see you will i? you don't just become a shield for someone else?" he asks quietly.

"no one will see me again. not even fellow shields who have died. it has been said that shields who are sentenced to die are sent to a place where no one else walks the same ground. an eternal world where there is no one else."

i feel him shiver slightly at my explanation.

he pulls away from me and turns me around so i am facing him. he rests his forehead on mine and i notice that there are tears streaming down his cheeks.

"i don't want you to be alone" he weeps. i smile and brush away his tears with my thumb.

"i won't be alone. i'll have the memories of us. of hongbin, of taeyong. i won't lose my memories. i won't be alone."

he doesn't seem convinced. then again i am not convinced.

there is no proof that we remember anything from our past.

jaehwan frowns and moves to kiss me. i cup his cheeks as i deepen it.

he pulls me into him and our members collide. he gasps into my mouth and i just smirk as i kiss him again.

i move my kisses to his neck and he tilts his head, giving me full access.

my hands move to explore his chest but before i have the chance to reach anywhere else, i feel his hand on my member.

i gasp in surprise and make eye contact with him briefly.

"i never got to repay you for the other day" a faint red fills his cheeks and i smile at how cute he is.