May 27,2014.
Well. I haven't wrote In a while. Some things came up.. O haven't talked to anyone in days. I can't fall asleep easily, but my mother allows me to sleep in.. I haven't gotten or stayed out of bed for more than four hours. It's became a regular schedule ..
Wake up,
Wear pajamas all day,
make sarcastic joke,
Check phone,
Realize no one would miss me if I was gone,
Go into a deep depression,
Start to self-hate and implode,
Lay in bed and try to rethink life,
Fail,
Get out of bed,
Possibly eat,
Cry a little at how worthless I seem,
Get ready for bed,
Try to sleep,
Nightmares or strange dreams,
Repeat.
This has become a cycle and it changed rapidly depending on when I do each thing.. Occasionally I'll get in an argument with my mom, take some natural sleeping aid pills and try to forget the day ever existed.. I go places when my mom forces me and in public when I see an old store clerk my mom has fancied to acquaint herself with I let out a fake smile and a nod of the head, I know what their thinking though.. "There she is, that one girl that tried to kill herself!" Yeah, but I failed, just like I failed at life for wallowing in my own self-pity.. I'm a poor excuse for a human and no one , no one should have to deal with me.. So why?
Why do I stick around..?
Sincerely,
Me?
^~^
' '
YOU ARE READING
The Truth.
Non-FictionThe Truth is a story of what's really going on with me, inside and out. No lies, all truth.. Just truth.. The Truth.