College Life: Freshman Year

15

Normani's POV

"Naturi, she's so cute," I tell my twin sister with a sigh. "I can't believe how far away she is right now. Why did she have to go home for spring break? I miss her already."

"Normani, you cornball. She'll be back in eight days."

"Yeah, that's eight days without kissing her or feeling her loving arms wrapped around me."

"What you two did today at the airport should hold you over until she gets back,"

"What? We just kissed."

Naturi starts laughing. "Right. You two were full-on making out for like half an hour. You even felt her up!"

"Naturi! You were watching us?"

"Everyone there was watching you. I was so jealous though. Moments like that make me miss having a girlfriend."

"What happened to sleeping with randoms?"

"I'm too old for that now. I'm 19, Normani. I'm not in high school anymore. The girls over here are all pretty boring though, except for that one model chick I met at Choie's the other day. "

"Zendaya? I didn't know she was your type."

"Don't be too quick to judge. I think she's pretty hot."

I start beaming. "Good. She thinks you're hot too."

"She does?" My sister asks as she starts to blush.

"Yeah, Lauren says she even has pictures from one of your photo shoots up on her wall."

"She has naked pictures of me on her wall? That's kind of creepy."

"As creepy as this?" I ask her as I open the folder of pictures in Naturi's computer containing Zendaya's Abercrombie & Fitch photo shoot. "Need I remind you that she's in a bikini in every one of these pictures and in five of them, her bikini top is completely off? Like you totally don't jill off to these every night. I'm not even sure if I should be touching this keyboard." I tease.

My sister starts cracking up. "Fuck you, Normani. What are we, 16?"

"I think you two would be really cute together. You could double date with me and Lauren!"

"You're kidding me, right? A double date?"

"I'm serious. We could go to the movies, get ice cream, hold hands with our girls. It'll be perfect."

"Normani, you're so lame. You really really need to start having sex with Lauren again. I liked you better when you were sleazy."

I sigh. "I'm not ready."

"Normani, it's been a whole month since that asshole Carlos did what he did to you. Lauren obviously loves you. Stop making her wait. Intimacy will bring you two closer together. Don't you want to make love to her again?"

"I do. It's just…I don't know."

"Not to put any pressure on you, but Lauren has crazy amounts of pent-up sexual tension right now. Why do you think she goes to the batting cages every night?" Naturi's tone becomes more serious. "Normani, I swear to you she looks so fuckable when she's there. Her muscle control, the way she swings. She always follows through if you get my drift. I swear if you don't give your woman the release she needs, I definitely will."

I know she's bluffing, but still. "I really miss when she'd cum in my mouth."

"Normani! You perv! I love it! Then why don't you just go down on her?"

"I want to, but I can't for some reason. I'm just going through a lot right now."

Naturi finally drops the subject. She knows the conversation is making me uncomfortable. Her and I have a way of knowing what the other is feeling and, occasionally, thinking. Call it one of those creepy twin things, I guess. Ten years ago, when Naturi fell off her bike and scraped her legs, I broke out in a rash in the exact same place. That's how eerily connected we are. So, I shouldn't be surprised if she knows I'm hiding something from her right now.

"Normani, what's wrong?"

I cuddle up to her on her couch. "Do you know how we were conceived?"

"Uhh…Dad's penis in that bitch Mary's huge gaping vagina?" I can't help but laugh at my sister's remark. I'm glad we both share a hatred for that woman.

"Mary told me we were the product of a broken condom at a frat party when her and Daddy were 21."

Naturi looks shocked. "But Dad said we were planned and that him and Mary loved each other very much."

"Of course he'd say that, he's our Daddy."

"I miss him so much, Normani."

"So do I. I miss him even more after hearing what Mary told me."

"What'd she tell you?"

My voice starts to quiver. "She never wanted us, Naturi. That's why she was drinking all the time. She says we ruined her life. She wanted to have an abortion but Daddy begged her not to. If she wouldn't have given in to him, we wouldn't have even existed."

"I can't blame her, Normani."

I'm truly shocked. I thought Naturi and I were on the same page. "Why?"

"If you're not ready to be a mom then you shouldn't be one. I'm speaking from personal experience. My baby would have been a month old now and yeah I still cry about it sometimes but in the end I know I did what I had to do. I couldn't have Carlos' baby growing inside of me."

I put my head on her shoulder. I should just come out and say it, but I can't. "Did it hurt?"

"Not really. It was just…invasive."

"I'm scared." I can feel a lump in my throat. I'm trying my hardest not to cry.

"Normani, what's going on? There's something you're not telling me. Are you…?"

I nod. "Naturi, I'm late."