I don't want a world, I only want you

It is love

  I'm so soorrryyy because my lateness in update this story, i have been busy and just yesterday, i finished my final exam. So, i will completely focus on my novel from now on. Enjoy!

  Forth is scared. For sure, they are not lovers, but he threatened Beam, forces Beam to have sex with him and the sex are never gentle but he always makes sure to makes Beam feels good too. Beam is kind, never get angry and he took advantage of it. He knows he is an asshole for treating Beam like this, although the sex is something that both he and Beam agree, or maybe only he thinks it like that but have sex with Beam really makes him in paradise, he feels something that he never feels it before. Beam's body, Beam's moans repeatedly calling his name keeps stimulated him and he just want to let it all out, ravished him, eat him until nothing is less. This feeling makes him scared, he scared if at some point he will hurts Beam.

So, when Beam asked him to stop having sex with him, he is sad, angry but at the same time he feel relieved. Maybe he needs to step a back, before he completely so something that against Beam's will. Beam, this time I'll follow your words and will not touch you but if it takes too long time for you to accept me, I'm afraid I will do something horrible to you. What should I do Beam?

"Forth, Forth what are you thinking of? I keep calling your name and you did not answer me?" Beam looks worriedly at Forth.

"Huh? N-Nothing. Why you call me?" Forth asks Beam.

"Oh, I ask you to bring the food here, I can't walk."

"Okay."

Their eating session is so quiet and Beam suddenly feel weird, because usually Forth never stop bothering him, teases him and always tries to make him embarrassed. And Beam can't stand this quietness and suddenly Beam feel guilty. Does his demand just now is too unacceptable and makes Forth become this way?

Stop Beam. Why you are so conscious of Forth. He and you is nothing! There is no need to feel guilty. You are not wrong. Repeatedly Beam said this is his mind, but he doesn't know why, the feeling of guiltiness keeps getting bigger. Why Beam? Why you feel this way? Does he already fall in love with Forth so when he sees Forth is not happy, he also feels sad? He wants to make Forth smiles.

He puts his spoon down and didn't feel hungry anymore. The food he tastes is tasteless.

Seeing that Beam is not eating anymore, Forth feels weird. He can feel that Beam is hungry and before his stomach never stop making noises. So, when Beam only eats little, Forth feels something is amiss.

"Beam, are you okay? Come and eat more." Forth says to Beam while feed his food to Beam. Beam opens his mouth and eats it. Suddenly he feels that Forth's food is taste more better than him.

"I want your food. Exchange it!" Beam demands.

Forth is dumbfounded. "H-Huh? But, they are same."

"I don't care! Exchange or not?!" Beam stresses on his words to show that he is so serious and will kill Forth if he does not exchange it.

Forth just exchange it. To tell the truth, he never scared of Beam's threaten, he feels that if he does not exchange it, Beam will cry.

Seeing that Forth exchanges their food makes Beam happy but he did not show it on his face. He takes his spoon and eat his food but something feels different.

"Exchange the spoon too."

"But..."

"I don't want to eat." Beam puts his spoon down and just stares at Forth's face.

Without words, Forth takes Beam's spoon and changes it with him. "Done, now eat."

"You are angry, I don't want to eat anymore." To put his act more real, he lets out crocodile tears.

This is love. The burden that keep pressuring on his shoulder suddenly lifts up. He already realizes his feeling towards Forth. If this is love, then it's been a long time he felt this way, just now he braves enough to make his heart and mind admit the truth. He keeps running away, afraid to fall in love with Forth thinking that Forth just playing and teasing him.

Up until this point he still can't completely makes sure that Forth is really in love with him, only time can say the truth. So, Forth let's gamble, I bet my life and all of me with you in this lifetime. What will you do, Forth?

But, of course, he will not show his love yet. It is a bit embarrassing and he wants to see how much Forth will keep stands his attitudes and loves him and suddenly he wants to act like a kid in front of Forth. Let say this is payback from him.

Forth truly doesn't understand Beam. He knows that Beam is just acting but he doesn't know for what and why? For now, he can just keep playing along.

"I'm not angry, Beam. Come and eat. I'm worried about you. Please, eat, okay." Forth smiles while coax Beam.

Although is Beam's heart, he already laughs a lot but his face keeps remain stoic. "Not sincere enough."

"Then, what I need to do to show my sincerity?"

"Hmm..., there is permanent marker pen in my drawer, bring it to me."

Forth takes it and gives it to Beam. "Done, now what?"

"Bring your face closer to me."

Forth already can sense trouble but to make Beam happy, he is willing. When he brings his face closer to Beam, he can see that Beam already smiles.

With the marker pen at his hand, Beam scribbles Forth's face and Forth's handsome face already change to ugly man. With this face, for sure no one will come near to Forth. Someone may even take him as a beggar.

"Done and remember don't erase it until I say so." Sensing Beam's happiness, Forth can only nodded his head.

"Good." Beam picks up his spoon and eat his food in enthusiasm. This is the best day ever!