Stephen and Sharpies ~ Watty Awards 2012

Part Two: Chapter Four

Alec,

    I might be coming home next month. My shrink told me that if I work hard I can be out of here soon. I know that is still awhile, but at least it’s better than three months. You asked me how it feels and I have to say it is boring. I feel the whole world is moving around me and I am in a dome that stands still. I miss you and I miss the moving world. No matter how much or how little you write me, you’re helping. I need them to keep me sane in this nut house.

    I am dying to see you again. I don’t know how you feel after everything. I told you I love you and I don’t know if you feel the same or anything , but I want you to know that knowing that you care enough to write me is enough. I want out I need to get out of here or I’ll go insane. I wish I could be with you right now, I miss my friend and my sister.

     Alec, what are you thinking? You asked me what I feel inside here and I feel scared. I wasn’t scared so much before , but in here I am scared. I don’t know if I will every get out of here. I think I am more scared in here than out there. So tell me what are you thinking? I need to know. Can you tell me what you feel? Do you like me? Love me? Hate me? Do you just want to be my friend? Tell me Alec what are you thinking?

Stephen

    I sign my name, fold the paper and seal it inside a envelope. I have time before dinner and there is a mailbox in the main area of the hospital. I know that tomorrow I will have to go there anyways so I make my way to the main area. I walk through the hall quickly and finally arrive. There are people everywhere, a lot of guys too. I breathe in and out deeply and walk to the mailbox. I drop my letter in and then head back to my room. Just as I am almost clear of no human contact someone stops me.

    “Hey you’re the girl in my group session, Stephen, right?” He runs his hand through his blonde hair and I catch a glimpse of huge brown eyes. He is dressed in the same white patient outfit as me.

    I nod.

    “Oh I’m sorry can you not talk to the male sort yet?”

    I breathe in deeply. “I’m okay.”

    “No you’re not. I’m Kyle, I won’t touch you, I promise.” He flashes a smile and I remember his story.

    “You’re the boy who tried to kill himself aren’t you.” I blush as soon as I hear myself say the words. “Sorry.”

    “No it’s fine. I am better now, but girls sort of freak me out.”

     I manage a small laugh and shake my head. “Guys freak me out.”

    “I don’t blame you.”

    I feel myself tense a bit, I don’t know why this comment did it to me, it did though. “Well I should go, but maybe I’ll see you around.”

    “See you around, Stephen.” He turns away and I walk down the hallway.

    I go into my room and then the tears flood. I sit and cry until my dinner comes. Then I fall asleep listening to the wind hit the iron bars. I dream.

    I wake up to Annie shaking me. She pulls me out of bed, pushing clothes towards me, and handing me a tray of mush. I eat as much of the food as I can and then dress in the white outfit.

    “Okay, I have to show you around your new schedule. You have a counseling session this morning for an hour. So we need to hurry.”

    I notice for the first that Amber isn’t in the room. Her bed is made and her tray is empty. Annie snaps in front of my face and I follow her. Dr. Cobb’s office is near the main area. I know I will have to walk through an area with guys. She walks just a step ahead of me and I keep my head down. We walk straight to the main area and then through it. On the other side is a hallway. We walk to the end of the hallway and then there is a door to the right. She knocks on it and then opens the door. I walk in and then hold in a scream.