Love Me Now?

Chapter 38

SEULHI'S POV

I sobbed in his arms hardly and my hands hesitantly went around his waist to return the hug, snuggling into his chest to let out all of my sorrow but, as a matter of factly, hugging him just made everything harder for me.

That's made me felt like shouting 'I love you' out loud and kiss the light out of him and beg him to never let go of me.

But,

I was afraid of rejection..

And I know he was going to reject me.

The warm liquid that was efficiently produced in my eyes proving my heartbreak, proving my love for him as it ran down my cheeks and continuously wetting Jungkook's red coloured sweatshirt.

"What do you mean?" As much as I wanted to stay silent and hugged him, the curiosity of mine went beyond its limit and I couldn't help myself but to let the words slide over my tongue. The only words I'd been craving to hear was him telling me he loves me the way I did. But knowing him and his attitude along with his favourite hot, sexy, slut-like ideal type, made me realise that it was more than just impossible.

An heavy sigh escaped his mouth and I could feel the hug tighten with his head hesitantly snuggled to the crook of my neck.

"That's mean you've proven it." He hugged me tighter and my heart ached just by hearing it- knowing that he really kissed me for nothing but just to simply test my stupid nerve. "You've proven me that you're not afraid of me."

A tear once again made its way down my cheeks and I closed my eyes tight, bearing with the pain that was overwhelming within me.

You're nothing for him Seulhi. He'd once make it clear that he would never fall for you.

With that, even with the biggest pain in the heart, I encouraged myself to stop hoping something that obviously impossible, then I pulled my hands away from hugging him and pushed his chest lightly to break the meaningless hug we were currently sharing.

I quickly wiped the tears away from my eyes and stared at him in the eyes, the breathtaking brown eyes that I couldn't describe till now and the one I knew for sure would gonna hunted me in the future.

I took in a deep breath and grabbed his hands that was still around my waist and put it away from touching me. "I've proven it and now, you must fulfil your promise to not touch me ever again."

Emotionless, I told bluntly and I caught his eyes slightly widened because of the sudden changed in my voice. He tried to reach out for my hand but I quickly backed away.

"Minger-"

"No no. You don't have to feel sorry about that. I'm okay with it. Its not like I love you or whatsoever." I laughed bitterly and smiled at him as sincere as possible that I could muster. "By the way, the kiss means nothing to us. It's a meaningless kiss. Its not a big deal, right?"

He looked at me with a guilty look and was about to say something again but I immediately interrupted him, not ready to hear his words which resembled a blade that went straight into my fragile heart.

"I guess I will just have to pretend like nothing really happen between us and that you never stole my first kiss. Maybe that way, I'll feel better right? Maybe that way, my first kiss will still has a chance to be given to the one I love, right?" I blurted out and choked in the sob that was trying to escape. I then flashed him one last smile and shrugged my shoulder off, "I guess I'll be okay. Lets pretend that that was a practise so that I could be a good kisser for whoever my future husband is in the future." I chuckled, trying my best to hide the sound of crying in my voice.