Chapter 17.

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I needed Niall to go away. Just for this time. 

I needed to find myself. 

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Two days have passed.

Two long, grueling days since I lost my best friend. My mom came over the next day and tried convincing it wasn't over, she just didn't understand. Niall hadn't talked to me or even looked in my general direction at school for two days. We barely went two hours without talking. I missed my best friend so much but there was no use in talking to him. He couldn't even see my face without wanting to throw up.

That stupid bitch Kiana must've been born to ruin my life, it's the only possible reason for her wanting my life to be destroyed. These past two days have been some of the worst i've ever experienced. I've just been home alone drowning in my own sorrow and misery. 

My mom came over yesterday to check on me but I didn't say anything besides "hi", "thanks" and "love you, bye". We watched two movies together but she left when she realized there wasn't much she could do at this point beside let me be by myself and work it out on my own. 

I was finally fired from my job, my boss couldn't handle the absence anymore and who could blame her? I was gone from work more than I was actually there. I just couldn't stand the fact of seeing Caiden's face there, not after all he's done to me and what he continues to do. I was so sick of my life at this point all I wanted to do was wallow in my misery and never leave. I just wanted to go back to six months ago. Back to when Niall and I were best friends and nothing could come between him & I (You & I reference wow oh). 

I wanted my life to be the way it used to be, but I was deathly afraid that I had lost my best friend for good, and I just didn't know what else to do. I missed him more than anything but I guess he needed what I needed. Space. 

His words still replayed over and over in my head. For the past two days his horrible words were still left imprinted in the deepest tissue of my brain. Slut. Slut. Slut.

My best friend of 17 years called me one of the worse names he could ever have, a name he knew would get me to leave and not bother him again. It hurt knowing that my best friend didn't care anymore, that he would choose one of his fuck toys and a baby that wasn't his over the one person who cared for him most. The one person who would be there for him always and forever, the one person he had left. When everything blows up in his face and he realizes the truth I hope it hits him in the balls what he did to me. 

I was going on my third pint of dulce de leche ice cream in my pajamas when I heard my phone ring for the fifteenth time in the last hour. I set the spoon back into the half empty container and set it aside on the table next to the couch that had become my sanctuary. 

The name Caiden appeared across the screen and I simply pressed decline and set the phone on the cushion next to me, resuming my ice cream eating. I didn't want to talk to him. I didn't want to see him. I never wanted to have anything to do with him. 

Time after time again I continued to get hurt because I fall too hard in love. Caiden was my first love and he broke me. What did I do? I gave him another fucking chance to break my heart. For the second time I let him break me and consume my every thought but worse than anything, I let him have the opportunity to break what I thought was an unbreakable bond between my best friend & I. 

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Two more hours passed when I heard a knock at the door. That's strange, my mom said she would come by tomorrow? Was it tomorrow? What time is it anyways? 

"Coming." I managed to call out as I made my way to the door. Unfortunately the apartment door didn't have a peephole so I took a chance in opening the door. To my unfortunate luck, it was Caiden. "Go away."

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