Teach Me To Live (OUAT//Peter Pan)

Chapter nine

I realized that my plan was actually quite stupid when I was about halfway to Felix and his entire group. I didn't stop walking though, and as I approached the boys I quickly cleared my throat. I was at a loss for words, what should I even say? I looked back and Erik was staring at me, I couldn't tell if he was mad at me or scared for me.

"Hey... um... I was just wondering..."

All the words I was looking for were scrambled inside my head. I couldn't just ask if Felix was straight or not. I needed to divert plans, so I said the first thing I could think of:

"Pan can we talk for a minute?"

Pan raised an eyebrow but then reluctantly stood up and followed me to the edge of the woods until we were out of earshot.

"hey..." I was stalling, trying to think of a reason I would have pulled Pan aside.

"Look love, whatever it is just say it." Pan rested his arm high up on a tree and quickly glanced back at the boys.

"Can I start training with weapons soon?" I let out a breath i'd been holding. That was a halfway decent excuse.

Pan looked at me as he folded his arms, "I'm so glad you're suddenly interested in training... but we're gonna stick to what we're doing right now. Just you and me, hand to hand combat."

"For how long?" Suddenly this was a conversation I was actually interested in having.

Pan suddenly seemed frustrated and answered sharply "Until I say so."

"When will you say so." I snapped back twice as fast, Pan seemed surprised.

"When you're ready."

"Ready for what?" I looked at Pan harder than I'd looked at anyone before. I stared into his eyes and tried to see past what his mouth was saying.

"Ready to use the weapon you already acquire..." Pan suddenly stopped what he was doing. He didn't mean to say that, he'd just let it slip. Now I was extremely curious...

"What? What weapon do I already acquire? My fists of fury?" I mock punched Pan in the shoulder and let out a laugh but he wasn't amused. He suddenly looked at me and was serious. He then said in a hushed voice,

"Magic."

"Magic? What? I don't have magic..." I began to look away from Pan and took a step back but he grabbed my arm lightly before I could move any further and inched closer to me.

"Yes you do Alessia... I feel it... I feel it in everything you do. And I know you feel it too. That's why you've always felt different, like you would never fit in. You don't belong in the ordinary world you came from with those ordinary people. You belong here." New information was drowning me.

There was a pause and Pan seemed the most sincere i'd ever seen him.

"... you're crazy." I whispered.

 I don't know if I was trying to tell Pan off, or trying to convince myself. After all, I'd seen Pan in action and I knew that he was not often incorrect. But to have magic would just bring us one step closer...to have magic would make me more similar to Pan than I initially realized.

For the first time I felt emotion creep past the walls I'd built up over years, I felt my heart speed up.

I'd been living in the spaces between emotion for my whole life, too afraid to go in one direction, too afraid to feel anything real. But, when Pan looked into my eyes suddenly it was like waves of feeling I couldn't begin to describe were washing over my mind and flooding my heart.

What is going on? Why is this one thing that me and him have in common making my head spin and turning my world upside down?

 Why is it that his eyes look so much greener than before...

I don't understand.

And I don't like things I don't understand, so I quickly cleared my throat and composed myself. I began to shut out the feelings that had momentarily entered me and looked at Pan with a blank expression,

"I'll see you at training."

Before quickly walking off.

A/N srry this chapter was weird and choppy. Hope you're enjoying the story so farrrrrr XD