The Fag Swag [boyxboy]

The Fag Swag {4}

                I threw open my front door and entered my house. Cujo barked and jumped up. My eyes widened in terror as he ran at me.

                “Cujo no!” I cried as he jumped on me, pushing me out of the house. I landed on my back on the front porch and groaned as Cujo barked and lick-raped my face.

                “Cuje, you broke my back,” I whined, shoving my giant dog off of me.

                Cujo sat down, his tail wagging and his tongue hanging out. He barked happily as I stood up and reentered the house, following me.

                I took my shoes off and made my way to the kitchen, hungry and thirsty. Afterschool snack, here comes-

                “NICHOLAS BRADLEY!”

                …Yea, here comes that guy.

                “Yes mother?” I asked, raising an eyebrow as she stormed over to me. She crossed her arms and glared at me.

                “Your facebook says you’re single. Don’t you lie to me Nicholas! I was stalking your freaking facebook!” she cried. “What happened to Nolan?”

                “We broke up,” I said, rolling my eyes.

                “Give me the details. Nick, you’re not telling me things anymore. I am your mother! I gave birth to you! TELL YOUR MOTHER DETAILS!”

                I winced as she started yelling. “Okay, okay!” I said quickly. “His ex-boyfriend moved back, and they’re getting back together! Happy?”

                “Nick, I think we need to have a long talk about boys, and trusting your momma,” mom said seriously. “Because, and honey, I mean this in the nicest of ways, but you’re turning into a deceitful slut.”

                “Gee thanks mom!” I cried. My mom. Gotta love her.

                “Nick, you’ve blown more boys than Spongebob has blown bubbles! Doesn’t your mouth ever get sick of it?”

                “Mom, I’m not having this conversation with you!”

                “SEE! YOU’RE DOING IT AGAIN! WHY DON’T YOU TRUST ME ANYMORE NICKY?”

                I groaned and face palmed myself. My mom was practically hyperventilating because I didn’t want to talk about my sex life with her. Oh my family…

                “Mom, I trust you. I’m just not over Nolan yet. I’m not ready to talk about it,” I lied quickly, wanting to calm her down. And it was sort of true. I wasn’t really over Nolan. I just didn’t want to talk to my mom about it, because she overreacted to things.

                “Okay Nick. I’m sorry. But please try to keep your mouth shut and your dick in your pants. I don’t want my baby to be a slut,” she said with a frown. “Well, anymore than he already is.”

                “Mom!” I said in irritation.

                I rolled my eyes, shaking my head. I turned and grabbed myself an Arnold Palmer out of the refrigerator and an apple.

                I went into my bedroom and locked the door in case my mom felt the need to come talk to me. I fell back on my bed and bit into the apple, trying to clear my thoughts. I didn’t want to think about the fact that I was dying tomorrow.