Au Revoir

2

Its been a week since I gave Alex my number, and we talk almost constantly.  Before school, after school, and even during some classes.  Alex and I are almost perfect.  We have enough in common to be close, and conflict on just the right amount to keep things fresh.  Sixth hour had just finished, so Maddie was following me to global studies while talking about the 20 reasons she's convinced her boyfriend is cheating on her.  I always tune her out though, so it isn't a huge deal.

I was staring forward down the hallway when I spot a familiar face looking back at me.   I immediately smile.

"Hey Jessie." Was all Alex said before we passed each other.  I realized Maddie had stopped talking.

"Wow... I can't believe the rumors are true."  She said while laughing at the situation.

"What do you mean?"  I glance at her, and she looks like she's debating whether to tell me or not.

"There are just rumors around school about you hanging out with that dorky new kid.   I see that they are true now."

"I think he's pretty cool."   I didn't think he was cool.  I knew he was cool, but I couldn't tell her that though because I'm too awkward to disagree with her.

"Jess, come on.  He's weird.   I mean who dyes their whole head bright red?"   We reached global studies, and sat in our spots.   I started to think about Alex.

I had never heard or seen anyone be mean to him, but then again I distanced myself from drama as much as possible.  Were people really bullying him?  If they were I would rip their faces off... no I probably wouldn't, but I would try to stop it.  The bell rang for seventh hour to start, and everyone sat at their spot.

I felt my phone vibrate in my back pocket, and I knew it was Alex.   I subtlety slipped my phone from my pocket when the teacher wasn't looking, and unlocked it.

Alex:  I'm struggling with a math problem.  Help?

Me:   Sure, anything.  What is it?

Alex:  How do you simplify 2i<6u?

Me:   Easy, I<3u.

Alex:   Awe!  I <3 U too! :)

Me:  Wooooow.... really smooth

Alex:   Mr. Burgson has spotted me.  See you in French.

Me: Okay Romeo.  See ya

Global studies was a little different since we started our group projects.  The groups were assigned, but I got in a group with Dan, and a girl I usually don't talk to named Lizzy so it wasn't too bad.

"So Jessie, a little ray a sunshine named Phil has been telling me about you and a guy.  Are you guys like a thing now?"  Dan says wiggling his eyebrows with a curious expression.

"No, we are just pretty good friends."   I chuckled at his disappointed face after I said that.

"How are you and Phil doing?"  Dan was about to answer when Lizzy interrupted.

"Okay, so I was thinking for our project we do a presentation about Bulgaria, since I doubt anyone else will choose it."  She seemed really sassy, but maybe she just wants a good grade.

"I guess that's okay."   Dan awkwardly says.

"Makes sense to me."  We divide the work up evenly, and start our research.

The bell rang, and everyone again darted out of the room.

"Hey don't be a stranger okay?"   Dan said while gathering his stuff.

"Yeah, same to you."  Maddie didn't wait for me since I was talking to Dan, so I walked to French alone.

While walking I think about if I should confront Alex about my suspension that I had before.   I decided I would call him later.   I walked into class, and sat down at my spot.  All of a sudden my eyes were covered.

"Guess who."  A voice whispered into my ear.   I got shivers down my spine.

"Hmm...  Is it Josh Dun?"  I sarcastically respond.

"Alexander Jackens get off of Ms. Elette unless you want a detention for harassing a student."  I hear Mme. Swanson call from across the room.  Alex's hands were removed from my eyes, and I turn around to look at him.

"Hey I need to talk to you tonight about something.  Is that okay?"  My face went from happy to serious while saying that.

"Uh yeah sure. I'm free all night, so call whenever."  The bell rang to he had to sit down again.

French couldn't have gone by any slower.  I swear the seconds literally felt like hours.  Not only was she talking about a boring lesson, but I needed to know if Alex was okay.   After the bell rang I went to my locker, gathered my things, and walked home.  My mom's car was in the driveway.  I wasn't expecting it, but I blew it off.  She must just be having a late lunch or something.

I took off my shoes when I got inside, and dropped my backpack on the couch.

"Hello?  Mom?"   I shout.

"You're home already?"   She popped her to look at my from the kitchen.

"Umm, yeah? It's 3:00 after all."  I walked into the kitchen to make myself a sandwich when my mom grabbed my arm.

"What do you think you're doing Dear?"  She was trying to act nice, but was actually squeezing my arm to the point where my hand was starting to lose blood flow.

"Ow Mom let go!"   I panic trying to loosen her grip.

"You know you shouldn't be eating after school. All you do is sit and eat all day. You are going to get diabetes."  She threw my arm away, but with so much force I fell backwards too. My head slammed against the counter, and I felt dizzy for a second.   My eyes started to fill with tears.

"Oh get ahold of your emotions. You're fine."   She spat while walking out of the kitchen. I heard the front door slam.  She must be heading to work again.

All I could do for at least five minutes was sit there on the floor in shock. My whole body shook to the point where I couldn't stand or grab anything.

After another five or ten minutes I ran upstairs and collapsed on my bed. I could feel myself getting an episode. I couldn't cry. I wanted to, but it wasn't possible.

Fat.

Emotional.

Freak.

No, its not true.

Yes it is, and you know it.

SHUT UP!

This internal battle continued for about five more minutes when I realized something. I wasn't in my room anymore. I was in the bathroom. Staring at myself.

Go ahead.

Do it.

No one will notice.

No one cares.

I subconsciously started to reach for the cupboard handle. My hand grasped the cold silver metal.

Just then the familiar ringtone I set for Alex started to play.

Selfish.

Stupid.

I forgot about Alex.

It took all I had not to break down as I reached for my phone. His contact picture showed a selfie of us making a heart with our hands in the cafeteria. I lightly smiled as I held the phone to my ear.

"Hey Alex."

"Hey Jess. How are you?"

"I'm... fine. How about yourself?"

"Can't complain. So, what did you want to talk about?"