A Break Apart

CHAPTER 31. The Aftermath

The truth was thunder to my ears; loud and frightening. I slowly got up from the couch with the shock I wore on my face, my thoughts like a thousand flipping pages that were being controlled by a harsh wind, bearing all the lies and broken trusts.

"Nadine, say something... You can punch me in the face, but please don't stay quiet," he said, getting up.

I had no idea what to say, or where to start. Hopelessly staring at him in pain, wonder, shock, disbelieve, anger, and every other emotion and expression that made a person distasteful seemed like the best option.

"Nadine—"

"You lied to me..." My voice halted his helpless advance towards me. "From the very beginning, William." My face contorted in pain as tears rolled out of my eyes.

"Nadine, I—"

"Stop calling my name." I shot him a glare. "You don't like it, remember? It sounds like sardine." Bittersweet tears flowed then, at the once good memory I had thought was genuine. His watery eyes felt it too and, with a sigh, he shamefully dropped his head down. But I felt no pity for him.

"I asked you not once if you knew David, and like Peter in the Bible you denied it three times."

He raised his head, his eyes like one who had just wept after their betrayal. "Seeing that picture really took me off, and I couldn't bring myself to tell you at that moment. I tried revealing everything when I came back but you didn't let me. I never meant to hurt you this way, please, believe me."

I scoffed. "Believe you? William, you fooled me! And everyone else around me. You made us all believe you were a good person. And you even had the guts to lie to my mum! The baptism? Choosing her to be your godparent? That was all part of the plan, right? And there I was, thinking you were really devoting yourself, but, no, it was just a disguise to get into my world. Classic bad boy move."

He sighed heavily. "I know nothing I say to you right now will change your mind about me. But I'm being honest. It was a plan from the start, yes. But the church, baptism, your mum, our friendship—all that wasn't a part of it. I got carried away at some point and became fond of you. I tried holding back but, each day I found myself at your door step."

"Oh, please... save me the hearty speech. Of course you couldn't help the unannounced visits because I was only a means to your freedom."

"That's not completely true."

I chuckled humorlessly. "And what is? Hmm?"

He heaved another sigh. "If David had, maybe just wanted to get back with you without his evil scheme, it'll be your decision to make and the situation wouldn't be as bad as this. Worst case, you take him back, we'd still be friends, and if you don't we'd be—" He paused, then sighed, the same time my heart skipped at what I had assumed he wanted to say. "And what if I hadn't seen that picture? Then I wouldn't have figured out his dark motive. You two would have met casually, and then he would maybe convince you to go someplace with him so you guys can talk things out and then that would be it, an easy and quiet kidnap, and I probably would have never seen you again. Just like that. This hurts me, too, Nadine." A tear drop rolled out of his eye, and he didn't care to wipe it off.

His last theory swept an eerie breeze on my skin, and all the while he spoke, with that familiar gaze that held me captive, my heart grew softer.

"I've secretly been a terrible person since we met," he went on. "I had no right to mess with you the way I did. But in all of this, there's one thing I can bet that I did right, that deserves an applause even. And that is, getting to know you. I did that so well that I ended up falling really hard, despite how much I fought not to, because I wasn't supposed to."