Tormented • Kylo Ren/Ben Solo

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"I see a little house on the hill and children's names, I see quiets night poured over ice and Tanqueray, but everything is shattering and it's my mistake"

19 ABY

Victoria always found it really funny when Ben got mad. His ears would turn pink with anger and he'd clench his fists to his side firmly.

It wasn't funny this time though, it almost scary.

William, their fellow Padawan, was once again making fun of Victoria for reading, and for liking the villains.

"Just go away Will." She told the boy in front of her. Victoria closed the book and rested it on her lap while sitting under the shade of the great oak tree next to the Jedi Temple.

Will pretended to think for a moment, mocking her. "How about no?" In a flash he took the book and ran, with Victoria hot on his heels.

She wished she was faster, but she wasn't.

To anyone watching, it would seem like they're two friends playing together on the grassy field. Ben knew better.

Victoria, his best friend of six years cared about books and the fictional worlds and characters they provided more than most things. He could see quite clearly the look of determination in her bright eyes and knew he had to help her.

He sprang into action and raced towards the two running figures of his best friend and her rival.

Ben reached them quickly and in a flash, his thin body had pinned Will to the ground with the book having been dropped onto the grass. Victoria raced over to her disregarded book and carefully wiped away the dirt and grass that was on the cover.

She walked over to the two boys and pried Ben off of Will. "Hey, it's fine, it's okay now." She shot a glare at Will before dusting off some dirt from Ben's shoulder.

"Thanks." He nodded solemnly, but his eyes were still watching Will steadily. His green eyes grew darker and seemed to now be a dark shade of brown.

"Ben?" She asked softly. He seems furious... and it wasn't even his book.

He didn't reply.

"Ben." She said this time more firmly. He still didn't even glance at her. Victoria studied his face. His jaw was clenched, his eyes had grown even darker, his ears were a soft shade of pink, and anger was radiating off of him in waves.

She looked at him worriedly for a moment.

"Ben!" She yelled and snapped two of his fingers in front of his face. Will had already left and Victoria was tired of seeing Ben glare at his retreating figure.

His eyes snapped to hers then immediately softened. "Sorry," He mumbled, "I just don't like him." This caused her to smile warmly. "You didn't have to that for me." She said.

Ben shook his head feverishly and took her right hand and kissed it gently. "Of course I did. Victoria, you're my best friend." She blushed slightly and looked up towards the sky. "You know, I'm no longer in a reading mood."

He chuckled. "Is that so?"

She nodded. "Come on." She said before grabbing his hand and taking him with her to the cliff they loved to sit near.

She flopped onto the ground lazily and giggled "Will looked terrified. I almost feel bad." Ben sat next to her and sighed "Well, you shouldn't. I don't."

"Yeah, I know you don't." She said, nudging his side softly.

He rested his head on her lap and sighed. A few minutes of silence pass.

"Ben?" "Hmm?" She played with his short, raven colored hair that briefly reminded her of Damon's hair.

She sighed as she twirled his hair around his fingers. "We'll always be friends, right? No matter what happens?"

He chuckled and sat up to face her, "I wouldn't have it any other way. You're my best friend Victoria Langford."

She giggled and pushed the feelings of guilt that arose when he used 'Langford' as her last name. "And you're my best friend Ben Solo."

Ben Solo...

●

PRESENT DAY

Kylo Ren woke up suddenly clenching his sheets, sweat covering his entire face. He looked around his room on the Finalizer, but it was too dark to see anything clearly.

It was the third time that week that he had that dream, a cruel flashback of his past.

More like a nightmare.

It had been almost 8 years since he last saw the woman whose friendship with him danced across his mind as he slept. He had the same flashback a month before that, and he had a totally different flashback in his dreams two months ago.

There she lay in the ruble.

Quiet, still, as the fire continued to roar around her. Her was now covered in ashes, her skin dirty, her clothes burnt or torn at some edges.

"No." Ben's voice cracked. He ran to her, to his love, and held her in his arms.

"No..." He sobbed, "No, no, no, no, no."

Tears poured down his face. He couldn't stop crying. She was dead.

The love of his life. Dead.

Victoria....

Dead.

Kylo shook that memory away violently. It was the last thing he needed. He glanced down at his body which was now entangled in his plain, white bed sheets.

He got up and walked towards his bathroom, his bare feet barely making a sound on the metal floor. After entering the bathroom, he washed his face and took in his appearance in the mirror.

There were dark circles under his eyes, his skin was now sickly pale, his bottom lip was quivering, and his long, dark hair was a mess.

Ben Solo is dead. He thought stubbornly, almost as if he was trying to convince himself. And not even poor little Victoria could ever bring him back.

He put on his usual attire, looked at himself one last time in the mirror, then put on his helmet. In that moment, any doubts about his past and whether or Ben Solo was truly gone diminished.

He was Kylo Ren now. Commander of The First Order. Nothing would stand in his way, and certainly not the memory of a girl he was once in love with.