The grey canvas

📌Chapter 11- Decisions for life

Dev:

Tara, the girl illuminated my whole world like thousand chandeliers, was now gone.

She left me behind in a pool of sheer darkness and never looked back again. Ofcourse, why would she even do that when I, myself, was the one who compiled her to walk away?!

Yes, she walked away becoz I had pushed her far away from my life. Purposely. Intentionally. Becoz my bestfriend was in love with her and she was HIS goddamn girlfriend...Meant that she loved him equally well. And hence our one night stand was meaningless!

I didn't remember how the previous night was like. Was it beautiful? Maybe. Or maybe beautiful was just an understatement. The real beauty of the ethreal night was beyond descriptions, I was so sure of it.

The most awaited night it was. And such a pretty night received such an ugly dawn!

So ironical. So contrasting.

I kept my hand upon my chest. The heart had been beating underneath. Those beats gained pace when I touched the swollen red marks on my skin. Imprints of nails and teeth. Must had Tara done this. An hopeless grin flushed up on my lips as I imagined Tara this close to me.

That girl had marked me as hers forever. Those marks were temporary but their impression on my life was permanent...Only if she knew...only if she still decided to hold on, just like always.

You are overthinking Dev. Whatever happened, was for good. You know that right? Mind asked me all of a sudden.

-I know. She had to go away. I heaved a sigh. Disgust wobbled up in my stomach. Sometimes some bitter truths are even worser than daggers!

So that is what happened. She went away... to her destination....how is that making you getting sad now? Mind threw another idiot question to me.

-Maybe becoz I had expected US to be the destiny! I accepted without any further word games. Mind smirked sarcastically to my reply.

The thing is that, you are highly confused Dev. You don't know what to do or how to put things straight and hence, you mess up everything! He snapped.

-There is no other option. I was like this since always. I said, as if complementing myself.

Like what? Being a moron?? He laughed as he spoke. I rolled my eyes at him in utter frustration.

-What do you mean by that? I asked in a super acidic tone and he laughed more.

You know what? Tara had to go away not becoz she is Kshitiz's girlfriend, but becoz she definitely doesn't deserve someone spineless like you! Mind answered and ensured I was left tongue-twisted thereafter.

He was correct. I was spineless indeed. The girl whom I loved the most, cared adored and worshipped like a deity, and to whom I made love last night, I asked that girl to move out of my house? ...and those marks on her body? I had made them right? Then how could I even deny? Just becoz I had to throw her out of my life for satisfying my stupid ego? Oh sorry, I was upto uniting her with her lover. I was upto involving myself in charity. I was upto calming my own heart in the process of breaking her heart intp thousand pieces.

Yes, however spineless I might be I still saw the pain in her eyes!

And I still pushed her away! Afterall my bestfriend was in love with her and she was HIS goddamn girlfriend!

Tired, frustrated, broken, I walked out of the room an hour later. Ayan was there sitting at the dining, looking at nowhere with blank eyes. Jamna was there busy with her daily chores. Sunlight was coming through the windown panes. Birds were chirping in distant trees.