that night ➳ yoonjin

xxvii

seokjin
meet me in our special place yoongi i hope you do remember

seokjin
4pm pls

seokjin
i'll be there waiting i won't leave till you go

i stared at my phone my heart and brain telling me different things. i could get hurt but i would get answers

answers that i have been searching for

answers that might relieve me from all this pain that i've been feeling for the last year.

i grabbed my coat and walked to the train station i need to see him.

kim seokjin don't hurt me anymore i can't take it anymore i'm so in love but i can only take so much

i looked at the window, i still has time to turn around and never see him again

i need answers i need to know what i did wrong

i'm terrified, he has me in his hands and he can do as he pleases with me

i gave him that power....

i loved this guy so much that i completely lost myself trying to find him

so many regrets

there wasn't a night when i didn't wonder what i did wrong what i could have done to change whatever made you run from me

but i didn't know what i did i loved you i tried my best for you

it's never enough and now i'm only a few miles away from my nightmare

you're not enough

i walked and walked to that waterfall and the only thing on my mind was how to act like i was okay with the outcome

my mind blurred as i saw him sitting by the river the scenery was beautiful like him the waterfall complimented him

it would be the perfect picture, our perfect date but this is not a date

he's going to let me down again

i stood there afraid to walk closer to him

and when we made eye contact i almost fell to my knees

i love you

i walked closer and he stood up looking at me, he had eye bags and his eyes were blood shot red

i want to hug you

"yoongichi you came"

i'm always here

"yeah i am you look terrible seokjin."

tell me how i can fix this

"so it noticeable."

i hate seeing you like this seokjin

"only a little how are you?"

are you breaking like me?

"i miss you yoongi"

it has to be dream

he fell to his knees holding my hands and cried silently

my heart broke even more

"seokjin stand up please."

i was the reason for his pain

we were both destroying ourselves

it was then that i realized we were toxic

"i love you yoongi why can't we work out."