Broken Ice

Exposure Therapy

Reid tried drinking water for hours that night in his apartment trying to get rid of his fear of water. He knew exposure therapy was an effective method for overcoming phobias. But every time he drank water he panicked and coughed it out in fear. He couldn't even take a proper shower. All he could envision was drowning in the water, even though in a shower it was nearly impossible. His alternative was to awkwardly cleanse his body one small cup of water and soap at a time.

"What am I supposed to do? People can only live 3 days without water..." Reid thought after his "shower". Then an idea struck him.

"Maybe I won't feel the same about coffee" He hypothesized, since it wasn't cold, but it still was water based.

Reid poured the water cautiously into the coffee pot, scooped the dark and aromatic coffee grounds into the filter, and turned on the coffee pot.

Once the coffee was done he poured his favorite drink into a mug. He stared at the dark liquid, watching the steam rise from it. Reid poured the sugar into the coffee and stirred it, watching it dissolve. He waited patiently for it to cool down enough to drink. The smell of coffee always comforted Reid, it was a brilliant scent that he would never get tired of. He had slight fear in him, but not as much as water. Maybe this would work.

With a deep breath, Reid raised the edge of the mug to his delicate lips. He poured the warm coffee slowly into his mouth. For a moment he stopped, holding the flavorful drink in his mouth.

"You can do this Reid, you have been drinking coffee forever, this is no different" he motivated himself.

With that, he gulped it down. He was expecting to freak out, but coffee was so much different than water, it felt completely normal. Reid smiled with pride.

"Well, that was easier than I thought" Reid said internally, taking a larger sip of coffee.

Then something went wrong. The coffee went down the wrong pipe.

Reid's body naturally began to cough because of the liquid inside of his lungs. But even this common problem filled Reid with fear. Reid dropped the mug of coffee on the ground in shock. He tried to breathe but he kept coughing, usually when this happened he would just struggle to say "wrong pipe" and give a thumbs up. But this felt so much more intense, so much more serious, Reid was transported back to the bottom of a lake, back to being face first in a bowl of water. And he couldn't escape.

When he was finally done coughing, he gasped for air as if he had just ran a marathon. Reid ran his fingers through his hair in stress. There were shards of the ceramic mug shattered on the floor, surrounded in a pool of wasted coffee. He bent down to pick up the pieces, sighing to himself.

"Great, now I can't even drink coffee without freaking out... this was my favorite mug too" Reid thought in disappointment and anger.

"Now what am I gonna do? Just die of thirst?" He thought hopelessly.

Reid cleaned up the coffee with some paper towels and threw away the mug fragments. He checked the time on his watch, it was already midnight, he wanted so badly to be over his water phobia before work tomorrow.

Discouraged, he turned off the lights and headed to bed.

Reid tossed and turned all night, he was afraid to go to sleep again, every time he closed his eyes, he had a hyperrealistic nightmare. He wished that Morgan was here to comfort him again.

Once Reid saw the sun begin to rise, he knew there was no use in going to sleep. He laid staring at the ceiling and groaned when his alarm clock began to blare. He became upset with the fact that he couldn't even manage to drink coffee to wake him up today.

Reid got up and got dressed. He looked in the mirror at his disheveled appearance, his tired, sunken eyes telling that something needed to be done soon.

"Just one more try before work" Reid convinced himself, opening his fridge and getting a bottle of water out.

He opened the water bottle and became nervous again. Not only were flashbacks and images of drowning coming to mind, but now he worried about the water going down the wrong pipe again.

"Stop being such a wimp already and drink it, it won't kill you!" Reid repeated in his mind, before cramming his eyes shut and taking a large gulp of water.

Reid began to panic again and coughed some of the water out, luckily though, he got some water down. At least he got some hydration.

He threw the water bottle back in the fridge angrily and headed to work.