•New Perspective /Chic/ Riverdale•

~pickens park~

Author's note:
  I'm just really proud of this chapter! Hope you enjoy it!

  Betty looked at me. She was a bit confused. I, an idiot ask her:

  „What’s up?”

  She sighed and took me to her room. I didn’t know what it was

  „I know about the webcamming.”

  Fuck. But who's Kevin and why does he know?

  „Chic, why?”

  „Money. But mostly to get away from myself.”

  She didn’t say anything but she gave me what I wanted. A fucking hug.

  „Betty...”

  „What?”

  „I love you. And Alice.”

  „We do too Chic, we do.”

  I was thinking about something and she realized and asked what’s on my mind. I sighted and told her the truth.

  „Um... do you think Alice is ok with me calling her... mom?”

  Betty sobbed a bit. What did I fuck up this time? Typical of me.

  „Chic! She would love it! But what made you not hate her? And I am not blaming you, I’d be mad too if she left me.”

  I took a deep breath and prepared for my speech

  „After I kicked you two out I felt like crap, I regreted it. Just the night before I was thinking about someone coming to get me out of there and you came and just after I realized that’s why you two fucking came. I wanted to kill myself. Then you came and saved my life and all... I honestly don’t know how to thank you.”

  She held my hand thight, not romantically or anything and sighed

  „Just stop with the drugs Chic, please, I don’t care about the webcamming just don’t fuck yourself like that”

  Hearing Betty swear was really surprising because she seems so innocent for the normal eye but deep inside she resembled me a lot. She just hid her anger and frustration instead of sniffing or smoking it away.

I never thought my 17 year old sister would be more mentally stable than me, a grown ass man.

  But who am I kidding, I wasn’t mature in the slightest. No one knew this because i hid it in my bad boy druggie facade but I was the world’s biggest  crybaby. I was so ashamed of this but the truth is that I can cry out of anything. It’s probably a symptom of the many mental issues I have going on. After thinking about it for a second I realized the Adderal was Betty’s.

  I did do many shitty, probably illegal things but I despised stealing. Even tho it wasn’t anything serious I told Betty I took one of her pills. She was ok with it but then gave me some money to buy the medicine I was prescribed.

  She told me where the drugstore was and I went, hidden in a big hoodie because I didn’t want anyone I knew to see me because I was trying to distance myself from my past, which was really childish because it’s going to haunt me the rest of my life because all the mistakes I did were completely my fault and I didn’t have anyone to blame them on.

  A tall, black haired teen approached me and wanted to sell me a stick of jingle-jangle.

  Fuck, I craved it so bad.
  The sweet, sugary, artificial stick of death I haven’t had in 3 days.

  But I couldn’t do that to Betty. I wanted to protect her from my old self but the truth is she protected me more and she would be dissapointed in me slipping back to my sinful habits.

  Surprisingly, the guy understood and walked away. In other cities I’ve lived in any drugs were taken very seriously and if you did jingle-jangle once you were the shit. But in Riverdale it seems like a normal thing you buy from a street seller.

Well, that won’t help with me trying to be clean. But I guess it’s also gonna motivate me more.

  I finally get to the pharmacy and a flamboyant, probably gay guy approaches me. He did seem very familiar. He told me his name is Kevin and he’s a friend of Betty’s.

  So that’s Kevin.

  He seemed a bit scared of me and told me he is sorry for telling Betty about my „fantasy fullfilment”. I told him it’s ok and I’m not doing that anymore. He walked away in dissapointment.

  „But you’re hot tho!”

  I bought my medicine and a notebook with the five bucks I had left.

  No one knew this but I really liked drawing. I don’t know how good I am but I can draw any face if I saw it only once. I sat on a bench in „Pickens Park” with my cheap coffee and drew Gerard Way.

  I really loved that man. I wished to be like him. He was an alcoholic turned into a famous rockstar turned to a friendly comic book dad.

  I stood there for an hour and also decided to draw Frank Iero. God, they were quite the pair in the mid 2000s. I wish I had a boyfriend like that.

  The sun started to come down so I went home. The house smelled of roast chicked. Mom hugged me and asked me how was my first day alone here. I awkwardly tell her:

  „Uhh... I sat in the park and umm... drew.”

  Surprised, she told me to show her my art so I showed her my drawing of Frank because I though that one was more interesting because I put a lot of effort in his tattoos.

  „You’re amazing! Did you ever take classes?”

  I didn’t, I just know how to draw. It just happens.
  She told me she can only draw stick figures and wondered:

  „Maybe your dad can draw...”

Then it clicked. Hal wasn't my dad. She would kbow if he can draw. I guess she just had a one night stand with some random guy at a party and I appeared.

  When we finished dinner i asked her why didn’t she abort me because she hasn’t striked me as a very religious person.

  „Chic, I know you won’t believe me but I wanted to keep you. It was Hal.”

  I really didn’t like Hal now. Not because he hates me. Because he's manipulative towards mom.

  It was 11 PM so we went to bed. I went to the bathroom. There was a razor there.

  I didn’t feel that urge anymore. I had no reason to.

  I looked down and the scars on my ankle. They were fading. I was a week clean.

  A week happy.