You're In My Veins // Gallavich

i will try to fix you.

Ian woke up to the sunlight pouring into the room. Their bodies were entangled and neither of them wanted to move from this exact position; it was bliss. 

Ian gingerly brushed his hand across Mickeys face, smiling warmly at him. The older boy stirred lightly in his sleep and moved away from Ian. Ian took this chance to slip out of bed. He did so as quietly as possible, sneaking off to the bathroom. He closed the bathroom door and sighed lowly. 

He opened the two pill bottles that kept him sane. He didn't want to have Mickey see him take these pills. They truly made him feel like less of a person, less of himself. He groaned lightly, his mind knowing that they had to take them. He swallowed both of the down dryly, following up with a large gulp of water. 

He turned on his heel and returned to the bedroom, where Mickey had now woken up. Mickey smiled at the younger boy and moved over to give the boy some room on the bed. Ian smiled gingerly and returned to his lovers side. 

"Where'd ya go?" Mickey asked sleepily, grabbing Ian's hand and intertwining their fingers. Ian smiled down at their hands and tried to push the thoughts out of his head about how the pills he just took evened him out. He didn't realize that he never answered Ian until he earned a light nudge. He ripped out of his mind and looked over to the black haired boy who was waiting for an answer. 

"U-uh sorry! Bathroom!" The ginger quickly sputtered out. Mickey nodded lightly, not taking his eyes off of the younger boy. He was staring at him intently, trying to read what was going on his head. 

"You okay, Ian?" Mickey asked lowly, seeing something else worrying his head. Ian nodded quickly, just wanting the topic dropped. He just didn't want to tell him how much he would panic every time he took his meds, how he was worried he was going to lose himself completely after taking them for too long. 

Mickey read his signals, knowing he just wanted to drop it. He finally looked away from the younger boy and sighed. He shuffled out of bed and stood. He padded lightly to the bathroom, still feeling like he was asleep. 

He walked in and shut the door. He walked to the mirror and examined the marks that were left on his body from Ian last night. It felt good that they were love bites for once. He smiled lightly and looked down. Two pill bottles he had never noticed sat on the edge of the sink. Being the hood kid he was, he investigated them. He looked first at what the bottles contained, until his eyes drifted up and saw 'IAN GALLAGHER'  plastered across the bottle. 

He inhaled sharply, staring at the name. Maybe this was why Ian was panicking? He didn't understand why Ian would hide this from him. He set down the bottles and did his business, leaving the bathroom. He padded downstairs and smiled lightly at Fiona. He poured himself a coffee and decided he was going to bring Ian one too. 

"Hey.. Is Ian on meds for his bipolar?" He asked timidly, feeling like it was a sensitive topic. She furrowed her brow at the young man and nodded. 

"Of course he is. He didn't tell you?" She asked, setting down her own coffee mug. Mickey shook his head at her, feeling like Ian was hiding a big part of his life. She padded lightly towards him and rested her hand on his shoulder. 

"Don't take it personally, Mick. He's still getting used to being on them, he might feel embarrassed." She rubbed his arm lightly, trying to comfort him. He nodded lightly and took the mugs and went upstairs. 

He lightly kicked the bedroom door open and passed Ian his coffee, giving him a gentle kiss on his forehead. He sat on the edge of the bed near Ian, looking straight into his coffee. 

"What's up, Mick?" Ian asked concerned, setting his free hand on the small of Mickey's back. Mickey sighed and turned to look at the redhead. 

"Why didn't you tell me about your meds?" He sputtered out, feeling a little hurt. Ian's eyes bulged slightly. Mickey was looking directly into his eyes, telling him he wasn't going to get away with bullshitting or changing the topic on this. Ian sighed and rubbed his face lightly. 

"I-I don't like them. They make me less of myself." He breathed out, feeling uncomfortable about talking about the feelings he had kept hidden. Mickey sighed lightly, running his hand through the red hair he loved so much. "I didn't tell you because it makes it real. Crazy people have to take pills." Ian whispered, looking anywhere but Mickey's eyes. 

"Hey, Ian. You're not crazy." Mickey started, setting both of their coffees on the bedside table. He laid down in front of Ian, running his hands through his hair once again. "You still seem like that shithead brat of a kid I remember." Mickey laughed lightly. "You're just more calm now, which can be a good thing." Mickey continued, trying to reassure the younger man that he was okay. Ian wouldn't meet his eyes, feeling embarrassed. 

"Just hate feeling like I need to take a pill to be fixed." Ian mumbled, burying his head into Mickey's chest. Mickey wrapped his arm around Ian and brought him in tightly. 

"Who said anything about bein' fixed? You're still you, Ian." Mickey mumbled into the younger mans hair. He pulled back lightly and finally caught Ian's gaze. "I wasn't asking about them to try and 'fix you'. Nothin' to fix. Just settles the shit that floats around in that empty noggin up there." Mickey laughed lightly, lightly knocking on Ian's skull. Ian rolled his eyes but finally broke a small smile at his lover.

"Just don't want to lose myself in the meds you know?" He whispered, his frown returning. Mickey flipped on top of the boy and straddled him. 

"I won't let you get lost. Promise." Mickey smiled down, bringing out that smirk of Ian's that he loved so much. The ravenhaired boy leaned down and kissed Ian forcefully. The both of them smiled into the kiss. 

"I love you, Mick." Ian mumbled into the kiss. Mickey pulled back and looked lovingly at the younger boy. 

"Love you more." He whispered, returning to the kiss.