Out of Time ❧ Kai Parker ✓

Chapter Four

I watch as she quickly walks back to her chair. I can tell that she is curious about what I have to say. But honestly, I don't want to tell her. If she thought that she deserves this Hell because of what she did, then I wonder what she thinks I deserve. I look up at her.

She sits in her chair, patiently waiting for me to start talking. "Okay, here it goes, from the beginning."

I wake up in my twin size bed in my room. It isn't fancy just a place for me to sleep. I crawl out of the bed and open my door. The house is oddly silent. Usually, I hear the kids running around or Mom making breakfast.

I exit my room and walk into the hallway. I notice Jo's bedroom door is open and she is not in there.

I bet they all went out to eat since it's Jo's birthday. Not like it's mine or anything. I let out a sigh and walk down the stairs. I enter the living room and notice all the presents with Jo's name, none with mine.

I don't know why I even expected something, in my ten years they have never done anything for me.

I don't know what is wrong with me.

I do not know why every spot of happiness that invades my life is smothered by darkness ruling my soul.

I do not know why I begin to drown when I am alone and entertaining my own thoughts.

All I know is that something of heavy importance is evading its gaping position within the back of my heart.

It is a hole that can be filled with artificial laughter, contrived smiles, and hopeful rushes of temporary joy. It is a hole that can easily be veiled by the thought of fun and adventure. It is a hole that can be overlooked, but only for so long.

It is a hole that can not be filled, I can't achieve my own actions or thoughts. I can not mend this wound with my own shaking hands or fill the gap with my own tears and blood. I cannot strengthen my faults when my weakness comes from my own seclusion.

There is something lost that I can not find myself. Or in other words, I cannot be healed by myself.

As I am lost in thought I barely notice the sound of a car pulling up, or the car doors slam shut. The sounds of the kids laughing and talking. The sound of happiness.

I quickly dash up to my room and slowly close the door. I linger at the door, my ear pressed against it, trying my best to hear what my family has to say.

"Happy birthday!" I hear my father, Joshua, exclaim. I'm assuming they are in the living room. I start to hear them sing happy birthday.

I turn around where my back is against the door and I slide down it. It's not fair. It's my birthday too but they just pretend that I don't exist. It's not my fault I was born different.

I'm the black sheep of the family.

"Hello," I focus back on reality to see Angelyn waving her hand in front of me. "You zoned out." She stated.

I stay quiet for a minute and then look at her. "Stop looking at me like that!" I tell her. I see the judgment in her eyes, she is judging me before even hearing my story. "Here it is." She nods her head and waits, "Long story short, I almost killed my whole family." I pause remembering what I did to my siblings.

I see her eye widens, but she never says anything. I think back to the moment that it happened. I smile remembering how they were so scared.

I look at Angelyn and continue. I walk over to the counter where the newspaper was laying and I handed it or her. The article about my family was on the front page. I pointed to the two oldest, "These two I hung off a stairway railing, and I put a hunting knife in her abdomen." I tell her as I point to the picture of my sister. Then I point to the last picture, "Him, I drown in the pool. He kept fighting me, and I was like 'I saved you for last you ungrateful little...' any way that was that."

She was quiet for a long time, so I decided to change the subject. "Man, I am starving. I'm going to make so food." I tell her as I walk to the cabinets to see what there is to eat.

With just my luck, there was absolutely nothing. My stupid father thinking of everything to ruin my life. I let out a sigh and close the cabinet door.

I turn around to go back up to my room and Angelyn is standing there. "Jesus, don't sneak up on me!" She looks like she wants to say something, "What is it?" I ask.

"You killed your whole family?" She asks there is a tremble in her voice. She's afraid of me. I smile at that.

I shake my head, "Not my whole family. I have a twin sister, Jo, I cut out her spleen." Angelyn looked up at me horrified. "What? You can live without your spleen." I state before I leave her in the kitchen and walk upstairs to my room.

"The article says Malachai was the one that murdered his family." I hear her call out from behind me, as I was ascending the stairs.

I smile and turn around to face her. She is standing in the doorway exiting the kitchen and enter the living room, "Who names a kid Malachai? It's like that expected me to be evil." I say and watch her reaction.

She looks horrified, "How could you do it?" she asks in complete confusion.

I walk back down the stairs and approach her, "I wouldn't be throwing around judgment if I were you. Remember poor little brother who paid the price." I tell her and walk back to the stairs and climb up them. I open my bedroom door and enter.