KiKasa RP - Black Magic

Chapter 9

Kise's POV

[Goosebumps, butterflies, my heart jumping to the sky was nearly what happened when he wiped the blood off my chin. He got dirty all because of me... how come I never paid attention to how caring he is even when he isn't thinking about it? Blush crept onto my cheeks when he confessed that hurting me was a mistake. I knew something was off about it from the first place, there's no way senpai would hurt me like that. When he suggested to have me over his house I almost collapsed again just from the excitement. I smiled and nodded as if I was his little pet, but then doubt began to rise in me. The pain strokes that started from yesterday were a horrible experience, I honestly thought I'd die twice just in that short amount of time, but... I realized my love for senpai yesterday too. Well, it was triggered yesterday, I assume. If senpai wants to make my pain stop won't my love for him cease too? I... I don't want that. Thinking about it I've never had a real love interest. Always basking in my fame and glory, I never had my head in an actual steady love relationship. Now that I realized my immense love for senpai i don't want to forget it in a blink of an eye! It's something for me to hold on to, he's someone so dear to me there's no way I'd agree to let go of that. I'm willing to suffer through any kind of pain just to be beside him, so please, bleeding once in a while is fine... suffering is acceptable.. please don't take this away from me.]
"Kasamatsu senpai... no, it wasn't your fault, it wasn't anybody's fault! You hadn't done a bad thing, you helped me realize how much I love you, and I'm thankful for that. You have no idea how much you mean to me! Please... If my pain concerns you, it's alright, I'd never lie to you. Trust me, I'm willing to go through that. See? I'm perfectly fine!"
[My voice started cracking and I sniffled as tears started streaming down my cheeks. The thought of him getting rid of my feelings was awful. I did notice I was getting a little over the edge sometimes... but if I have to commit murder for him, it's fine! It'll be better for the both of us. If I have to struggle through these strokes, it's fine! I'll just have to clean those paddles of blood afterwards, nothing serious. I won't let these feelings slip away.] hick "don't make me stop... loving you..!" hick

Kasamatsu's POV

[ God help me, this is severe. Did he really just suggest keeping the pain for me? I knew I intended to find a strong spell, but this is legitimately ridiculous. I'm glad he realized that I never meant to harm him and that he was okay with me even with the knowledge that it is my fault he is hurting, but I'm not willing to cast anymore pain on him, even if he felt comfortable with the idea itself. ]
"Kise, don't be like this. This kind of thing... It isn't love. Harming the person you like is love, it simply makes a person into a despicable human being. Ah! Please don't cry, I don't know how to handle this..."
[ I really fucked up. He was pretty much begging to keep these feelings, what am I supposed to do? I mean... I not really gay. Then again, I never really thought too much of gender while looking for a partner.. But still, I always just pictured myself with a girl, because.... I don't know, I just did. Kise was not bad looking by anyone standard, and while he was a quirky brat, he was rather loveable and definitely the most normal out of the Kiseki no Sedai. I just... never thought about him as a lover. And even if I were to consider it now... I wouldn't want to hurt my significant other this way. I can't live with kind of guilt. And I'm sure Kise wouldn't want me to just date him out of pity alone. ]
"Listen... I know it's hard, but you can't keep having pains like these. What about the rest of your life? what about Basketball? I wouldn't want you to be too ill to play something you love. Hear me out.. let's try to find a way to reverse the effects of the spell without taking away your feelings. If you'd be willing to come with me and do that... I'll even consider going on a date with you. Fine? We are just going to search for a cure for your strokes. I don't know how I feel about you right now in a romantic aspect... But.. I'm willing to try for you if you're willing to try for me."
[ I hope I managed to choose the right words. I honestly hoped that maybe the spell will just dispel itself at some point, or that he'll realize that his feelings are probably a fad... but... for the off chance, he really does like me, even without the spell compelling him to, I at least owe him a nice date for the literal physical and emotional abuse I'm putting him through. ]