The False Princess

Chapter 15

Edited

When I was a child, there was a quote that often kept me going when I wanted to quit.

"The darkest night is often the bridge to the brightest tomorrow."

I think of it now. I need the encouragement. Because I don't think anything I've ever done in my life is harder then what I'm about to do right now. I have to go back to being Lynx. I don't want to-it's the last thing I want to do, but I will. I will do it.

I'm almost ready to go back to Asenhouse, when another thought stops me cold in my tracks. Derrin.
He thinks I'm just an orphan named Lynx. What will he think of the real me? What will he think when he learns that I lied to him? I take a deep, shaky breath and run my hands through my hair. Ok. I'll tell him. I will....but when the time is right. I'm still the same person. I'm still Lynx.
Right?

I swing onto my horse and ride back to Asenhouse. Without a word to anybody else, I walk to my room and change into a soft nightgown. I climb under the scratchy sheets and roll onto the side that's facing the wall. I pretend to be asleep when Kaone and Briss walk in. They are gushing about how the Prince was looking at them and all of that junk. I can't help but stifle a laugh. Mithil has always been a ladies man, but he likes hard to get girls that don't care what others think of them. They are not his type.

After the talking stops, I figure that Kaone and Briss are asleep, and I feel that its safe to turn over. But when I roll over, I find Briss staring at me-a evil glint in her eyes.

"What did the queen want to talk to you about?" She whispers. I roll my eyes.

"Go to bed." I groan tiredly. I roll over once more, and close my eyes. I just want to sink into the painless realm of sleep. But I feel the sharp point against my back. My eyes fly open and I sit up quickly. Briss holds up a knife. A really sharp knife.

"Tell me!" She whispers, glaring at me. I narrow my eyes.

"Why do you want to know so bad?" I ask defensively. She just laughs.

"I could care less. But Kaone's the one who wants to know. She put me up to this."

My blood runs cold. I thought I trusted Kaone. But Briss never lies. She never lies.

"She just asked about my past! Thats all!" I hiss.

"Happy now?"

Briss smiles, the menacing look in her eye fading into the sweet facade that everybody else sees.

"Yes"

.............................................................

I wake up the next morning, bright and early. I climb out of the window, and sit on the ledge; thinking, just like I had so many days ago. The time is coming that Gai will make his announcement. Within the next few days, I'll either be back to my old self, or I'll be dead. A unfamiliar feeling floods my chest, making it hard to breathe. Fear. Fear that I won't be able to exceed Gai's expectations. Fear that I'll die. Fear that I'll live and can't rule the kingdom properly. The last time I sat on this windowsill, I reflected how much I had changed. Today I realize how much I've changed again. I'm not the carefree girl, or the cautious young women anymore. I'm not really sure who I am. But that's ok. I don't need to know. I don't need to plan exactly what my whole life will be like.  I just need to survive. My only plan is to live life to the fullest. To never back down, to never regret, and to never look back.