How it usually plays is it begins wherever we are. I did something shitty in her mind and she starts to lecture.
She begins to talk about alternative actions I could have done, and why they would have been better.
I think in my head "Oh fuck here she goes again." I don't want her in my head.
I pray for her to stop all she does is keep on going bitching instead.
Pounding and pounding the walls that I built, willing the water to flow. She yells at them and then she brings variety to her demolition.
Next she starts to lose her short temper. Every punch getting stronger with every blow. So, weakened and desperate, my mind goes through a division.
A part of my head keeps tabs of what's said.
The other just builds more wall.
I look at my mom with emotion all gone
And lie to myself that I don't care at all
That I don't care about her.
Or what she thinks I am.
Or what she says to me
And yet here I am.
I'm writing once again.
Because I've been hurt once again.
So I try to heal once again.
But in reality,
I'm just building more walls once again.
YOU ARE READING
Blocked
PoetryThe mind can be dark place sometimes. The body is what covers it. No one knows what's underneath... "The problem of hiding my emotions is the fact that they build up." The random crap that goes through my head; an entire school year's worth of poetr...
