Peffron: A Love Story

Chapter 5: Never Again

Seriously, my life is so screwed up. I was married to OF... And so was TF... And OF was also married to herself. Please don't tell me that the unnamed random side character that just so happened to be part of the story was also married to her! God that would be weird.

And does this mean that OF has the ability to transform into a hermit crab or something...? To seduce possible lovers? 'Cause goddamn, hermit crabs are pretty sexy.

Seriously, nothing can possibly surprise me anymore!

Oh what a naive thought.

***

Again, I went to school. (Is this story getting repetitive yet? If so, maybe I can make it to the What's Hot List!).

As I walked to my homeroom, I met up with two of my other friends. And goddamn it, I need to come up with more names.

We can call one of them... hmm. Maybe YAF for Yet Another Friend. (Because I have so many).

The other one can be referred to as... (pause for dramatic effect) BOB! And no it doesn't stand for anything.

After I came up with some VERY original names, I resumed telling my amazing story that totally isn't getting annoying.

So yeah, I was talking to them. I needed to vent, and Bob and YAF were both pretty messed up so I thought they would be able to handle it.

"So, Peffron like TOTES turned out to be OF!" I said twirling my hair. "Who knew?!"

"..." Said YAF, as she facepalmed.

Well at least she wasn't also having an affair with Peffron. Thank God.

However, and I think you all know what is coming, Bob said, "Oh yeah, I'm like totally also married to Peffron."

"UGH I KNEW IT!" I yelled in the middle of advisory. Some of the younger children turned to look at me with bewilderment clear in their facial expressions.

I just glared at them. I was obviously having an emotional breakdown, can't they just leave me alone?! Why does everyone hate me!

YAF then decided to say, "Oh yeah, and I'm also Peffron."

Okay. What. The. Hell.

MY LIFE HAS BEEN TURNED UPSIDE DOWN BECAUSE OF A HERMIT CRAB! I've dealt with heartbreak over and over all because of Peffron, thinking that true love would finally win! But I guess there's no such thing as true love when you're married to a cheating hermit crab that is actually two of your friends.

So the moral of this story is:

An apple a day keeps the doctors away.

AN: Well, here ends the story of Peffron. I hope you liked it! Thanks for reading, and you guys should check out my story The Book Of All Things Random and give me prompts. I buy my laptop tomorrow, and I will go back and italicize the names and fix whatever other changes need to be made. Thanks so much for all of your support, and make sure to go back and vote for your favorite chapters!

Oh, this chapter is dedicated to Maiko_Aizawa since she is one of the stars! (Hint hint, she may or may not be YAF...)

*sniffles* Endings are always so bittersweet.

Peffron: "Bye!"

Me: "SHUT UP PEFFRON I HATE YOU YOU BROKE MY HEART!" *slaps him*

Okay seriously, bye.

Updated: I have finished editing and going back. Please comment if you have noticed any changes I should make. And also, comment if you know what I should do with this story. Thanks again! (Also comment if you have any requests for other books to write).