How to be happy? Find the purpose of your life - a practical self-help book

The goal is your purpose

Setting true goals is the most important thing which everyone should do in their lives. Without it human life becomes a series of never-ending frustrations leading to the growing feeling of lacking the purpose in life. As a result, it can lead to a long-term depression, which can even cause people to try to take their own lives. Without goals our lives become devoid of happiness and hope, because we are like a rumpled piece of paper, moved by the wind in all directions. All we can do is to stand in one place, as long as the wind, which here is the symbol of unpredictable or random events, doesn't throw us somewhere else. We shouldn't have illusions that it will become better – it certainly won't happen without clearly set goals, because if we don't know what we want, we also don't know what will make us happy. Moreover, it's not You who decides about it and after some time You'll end up in another random place. So think: wouldn't it be better to have control over the place You are in? We know as a fact that in our lives not everything fully depends on us. A wind, which is a force pushing us in some direction can appear. This wind is a symbol of unpredictability – all accidents, chances, decisions of other people, etc. Unfortunately, many people believe that we have no power over that force, that it will always influence us and throw us like that rumpled piece of paper, wherever it wants. However, let us think for a while – is it true that human – a weaker being – represented by a piece of paper, really has no chances to win with the forces of nature, such as that ruthless and unpredictable wind?

The answer is easy – a human being, represented by a piece of paper, has chances to win, as long as it is properly formed – like a paper plane. If we have a regular shape – in this case the shape of the plane – we can properly adapt the arrangement of the wings, so that the wind won't force us out of the right path – in our case the path leading to the goal! When we set our goal we shape ourselves – we take a regular form, just like that plane, and that way we have control over our situation and the direction we're facing. As it turns out – what I've been trying to graphically explain – something which seems to be as weak as a piece of paper can handle the unfriendly conditions – as long as it's been properly shaped before. Of course, such shaping requires us to make effort, often quite big, but isn't this a price worth paying for Your own happiness and joy of life? The mere awareness of having control over Yourself will give You enormous satisfaction and zest for life!

How You shape Yourself depends entirely on You!

When we have our main life goals set, it's not a problem to set the intermediate goals, which direct our flight on the wind onto the right path in order to keep the final destination in sight. Don't worry when one of the intermediate goals doesn't turn out the way You wanted it to be. You simply have to set another intermediate goal in order to keep moving towards the main goal. We can divide our main goal into as many intermediate goals as we wish. However, we have to remember that sometimes it's better to keep moving on taking small steps than to rush and fall over.

While You're setting goals it is important to remember that they should be true – they should be in harmony with You. Only an appropriately set goal can give purpose to Your life, therefore it is crucial to avoid false goals. A false goal is a goal which, for some reasons, You consider to be Your own goal, but which in reality isn't, and, worst of all, You may not be aware of that! When Your goal is false, You are on a path which is false as well. Following this path won't give You happiness, even when You reach Your alleged goal. Not only this goals isn't Your purpose, but also achieving such false goal may badly affect Your mental health and consequently deepen the lack of life purpose. However, don't worry. All I want to do is to make You realize how important it is to set Your goals properly. Remember: it's better to calmly think about Your goal than to set it too quickly and possibly waste years on following the wrong path.

Michał Kiciński

source: https://openbooks.com/

Michał Kiciński – the co-founder of the CD Projekt company and the co-creator of the computer game "The Witcher". When Michał began his career he promised himself that he will earn so much money in the future that he will never be in financial distress. As we all perfectly know – he managed to do that. However, did You know that there was a time when the pursuit of all these things almost destroyed his health, both physical and mental? Do You think he was happy then? Therefore, can we say that he has achieved a personal success? Somebody looking at his situation from a certain perspective could say he has... However, the goal he had set – earning the money he wanted – made him pay the price much higher than the "value" of this goal. Constant work, which required staying up late, led to the break up of his long-term relationship. Moreover, he experienced recurring illnesses, hair loss, insomnia and a constant feeling of "tension" which didn't allow him to relax and find some inner peace. Michał realized that was not the right path. He understood that he cannot carry it on, that money does not bring happiness if the "price" you have to pay to achieve it is too high. He realized that the inner peace and pure mind will bring him greater personal happiness and understood that's the most important thing in life. He got rid of many material things which, as it turned out, he didn't need at all. Now he lives more peacefully. He has more time for himself and spends it on meetings with friends, which relax him and make him a happier person; contrary to the past when he used to spend his time on something which was destroying him inside. Thanks to that Michał Kiciński started living in harmony with himself. Now it is safe to say that he's achieved success. Why? Because he does things which make him happy. Michał Kiciński is a perfect example which shows that the path leading to the goal is as important as the goal itself. It's no use achieving a goal at the expense of things which are more important for us. You should also remember that we are people, not robots. Remember that only You know what can make You happy. After all You're the only one who spends 24 hours a day with Yourself. If you do something against Your will, Your thoughts will begin to destroy You. The worst thing is that You won't be able to escape it, because Your thoughts are with You all the time, wherever You are. Don't let it happen and live in harmony with Your own conscience. Just as Michał Kiciński does. If you understand it now, You won't have to go through all the hardships Michał Kiciński had experienced before he realized what's really important to him.