Loyalty

Chapter 8: Mania.

Brian's POV

As my career was becoming more successful, I felt the need to show gratitude to the people around me. I didn't get to where I am on my own, so I always did little things to show the people closet to me how thankful I was for their support. But for Christmas, I decided to do something special. Sal, Jess, and I had gone to a few wrestling shows together, but nothing too grand. WrestleMania 29 was taking place in April 2013, at the MetLife Stadium in New Jersey. I thought there was no better way to surprise my two best friends then buying them tickets to the biggest pay-per-view event of the year. I figured it would be something that we would all enjoy. Plus, Jess has so much joy during the holidays. She always puts so much thought and effort into gifts. I saw this as an opportunity to return the favor.

"This is too much, Brian," Jess said, handing the ticket back to me.

"Are you kidding? What's the point of having success if I can't share it with my two best friends? Plus, I still owe you for taking me in during Sandy," I insisted.

"Brian, you don't owe me anything. I took care of you during a hurricane. Its what friends do. I didn't expect anything in return, especially not something like this," she said.

I expected Jess to act this way. But this is the exact reason that I wanted to do something like this for her. She has always been one of my biggest supporters, throughout my career but also just in life. Jess has always been there when I needed her. But she never asked for, or expected, anything in return. She was simply a good friend. That's why I felt that she deserved something special.

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Being the one who doesn't drink, Jess offered to drive to the show. Sometimes I felt bad for her since she's normally the only sober one around a bunch of drunk people. I'm not sure if she feels left out sometimes, but it's her own personal decision, and I respect that. She always reassured me that she didn't mind us drinking, as long as we didn't drive. As much as I protested, Jess insisted on buying all our drinks, since I bought the tickets. I eventually gave in and enjoyed a few beers. Sal was also drinking, and he was getting a little tipsy. But Jess and I didn't mind since Sal was a fun drunk. He didn't cause any harm, but he would just say some stupid things. Even more than he usually does.

Competing in one of the first matches of the night were three guys known as the Shield. The group consisted of Dean Ambrose, Roman Reigns, and Seth Rollins. They made their way to the ring through the crowd, which is a special type of entrance. Most wrestlers enter from backstage and go down the ramp.

"It seems so dangerous for them to go through the crowd like that," Jess commented.

"Yeah, they probably have people grabbing their crotch and stuff," Sal said.

In his drunken state, Sal couldn't help but give us his commentary. Sometimes it wasn't even about wrestling. But it made Jess and I crack up.

"That Roman Reigns.... His hair... it's just so luscious and flowing. He's so dreamy, isn't he?" Sal asked, turning to Jess to get her opinion. I couldn't wait to hear this.

"Uhhh sure, Sal. I guess he's dreamy. But I'd prefer Seth Rollins personally," Jess replied, much to my surprise.

"Seriously?" I asked, a little shocked.

"What? Sal's allowed to have a man crush, but I'm not?" She said defensively.

"No, you're entitled, I guess. I just didn't think that Rollins was your type. You know, considering he's a GUY," I responded. I tried to contain my feelings, but I was completely thrown off by her comment.

"Well I didn't think a 270 pound Samoan man was Sal's type either, but here we are," she said, still joking about it.

"I just call it like I see it. I'm not afraid to admit that another dude is attractive," Sal said, slurring his words.

"Why are you getting so upset? We're just joking around," Jess said, trying to calm me down. I guess she realized that her jokes weren't helping.

"He's jeaalllouuss," Sal slurred. I gave him pleading look, hoping that in his drunken state, he wouldn't say something about my feelings for Jess.

"What do you have to be jealous about?" Jess asked. Now she was the one that was confused.

"He's jealous because him and I will never, in our whole lives, have bodies like that," Sal commented, as he pointed to the huge, muscular wrestlers on our screen.

"I am NOT jealous. Why should I be?" I said, trying to sound convincing. But they could probably tell I was lying.

"Brian, you know I love you but you're being crazy," Jess said. Sure. I know you love me. Just never the same love I have for you.

"Whatever," I said, blowing it off.

"Can we just forget about this whole conversation, and just enjoy the show?" Jess asked. I think she sensed that things were getting a little tense, and she wanted to shift the focus somewhere else.

The truth is, I had no right to be jealous. It's not like Jess is my girlfriend or anything. So, I shouldn't have a reason to get upset. But as much as I tried to tell myself that Jessica's comments didn't mean anything, I was hurt. The whole time we were friends, I had just assumed that the reason she wasn't interested in me was that she was only attracted to women. And I could accept that. I couldn't be too offended because I didn't think there was anything I could do to change her sexuality. But when she made that little comment about Rollins, it made me think that maybe it was just me. It's not the fact that I'm a man. She's interested in men, but she's just not interested in me. As if my self-confidence wasn't low enough. Now I had to accept the harsh reality that Jess might want to be with other guys, she just doesn't want to be with ME.

Looking back on it, I guess I shouldn't have just assumed Jessica's sexuality. But it's something she rarely talked about because she didn't want to be defined or judged by it. I guess that's part of the reason why I never really asked questions about it. I didn't want to make her feel uncomfortable. Or maybe I never asked because I didn't really want to know the answer.

Once I came to this revelation, I felt like there was a shift in our friendship. But my feelings for Jess didn't diminish. If anything, they grew even stronger. My love for her was so intense that it was getting increasingly difficult to be around her. It's just too painful to see someone I wanted so badly, but I couldn't have.

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A/N: So, I know this chapter is really short, compared to all my other ones. But it's basically just a bridge chapter, because the next chapter will be an important one. The next one has some real angst in it.