Chapter 29: Help.

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Jessica's POV

When I woke up the morning after my fight with Brian, I almost felt numb. I didn't have any tears left. Once I went to bed last night, I passed out, almost immediately. I was both physically and emotionally exhausted. My body needed a break.

The longer I sat there and thought about Brian, the more my sadness grew into resentment and anger towards him. I thought about all those times he's called me, asking for help. All those times I picked him up at some random bar, because he was drunk and couldn't drive himself home. Whenever he needed me, I was there. Even if we were in the middle of an argument, if he needed me, I would be there for him. It's not like I expect any kind of praise, or even recognition, for doing those things. I did them because he's my best friend, and I would do anything for him. But I expected him to do the same thing in return, and be there for me when I really needed him.

When I told Brian what was going on, I expected him to get upset. But I didn't think he would get THAT angry. I didn't expect him to say so many mean things about me. He said a lot of words that were hurtful, basically calling me a whore, a liar, and a cheater. None of the things he accused me of were true. I thought he knew me better than that.

From the beginning, I didn't expect Brian to completely understand what I was going through, especially if it's a condition that he's never heard of. But once I explained some of the symptoms to him, I thought he would've been more caring and supportive. Even when I explained some of the potentially serious risks and the reason for my ultrasound, he was still angry at me. Brian was fixated on the fact that I was hiding this big secret from him. He was so focused on that, he failed to see what was really important. I was in pain, and I needed his help.

I just wanted Brian to hold me in his arms and tell me that everything was going to be okay. Even if that wasn't true and I wasn't going to be okay. I wanted him to protect me. Or at least, I wanted to feel protected, even though realistically I knew there wasn't much he could do about my health.

Brian was normally so sweet and comforting. It's one of the things I love most about him. Last night I desperately wanted to feel that comfort, so I settled for wearing one of his hoodies. I had a habit of wearing some of Brian's things, especially while he was away. It made me feel safe, and protected, something I wanted to feel now more than ever.

I was prepared to go to my ultrasound by myself, as I have done many times before. I would have to do this, with or without Brian's support. Unfortunately, this is not the first time I've had to go through this over the years. In fact, I can't even keep track of the number of scans, tests, and ultrasounds I've had to go through. It's something I've had since I was a teenager, so it's always felt like a part of my life. Fortunately, the results have never found anything too serious. For the most part, I've had this thing under control. There are occasional hiccups here and there, but that's normal. Well, my normal I guess. I was so used to doing this alone, that I was beginning to accept that this time might have to be the same way.

When I finally got out of bed and looked at my phone, I saw a bunch of missed calls and texts from Brian, and even a few from Sal. But I didn't want to deal that yet. I just didn't have the energy to think about Brian right now. My first thought was to call Bessy since she's been helping me through a lot. She picked up almost immediately, probably very worried about me. The last thing she heard was me quickly hanging up on her last night after Brian walked in.

"Hey, I've been worried about you. Are you okay?" she asked me.

No. I was not okay. I told her everything that happened the night before. From Brian thinking I was pregnant to him storming out on me after I told him the truth about my situation.

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