Loyalty

Chapter 37: Guilty.

Jessica's POV

After seeing Brian's reaction to the punishment, I felt completely guilty for going through with this whole thing. While I was doing it, I didn't realize that Brian would get so upset. I thought he would laugh it off and it would all blow over quickly. Because it was part of a TV show, it all felt like one big joke. I got caught up in the moment and didn't consider the real consequences of my actions. They were all just supposed to be funny skits to get Brian to snap out of that jealous rage. But it may have backfired...

When Brian told me not to go home, I was initially disappointed because my instinct was to make things right with him. I wanted to tell him how sorry I was, but he insisted that he needed space and I had to respect that. I think that having this space was good for the two of us. Sometimes when we have arguments, it's best for us to have some time apart so we could cool off. That way we don't get caught up in the heat of the moment and say something that we'll later regret. We both just needed some time to think.

Sal told me that I could hang out at his place until this all blows over. I didn't know how long it would take but I just hoped Brian would feel better before we both went to sleep. I wanted to explain to him why I participated in this punishment. When I tried to explain myself before, Brian didn't want to listen because he was still too angry with me.

"I'm sorry I caused trouble between you two. I didn't think he would get so upset. This is all my fault. I talked you into it," Sal said.

Sal was the one who came up with this whole idea in the first place. He came to me with the idea right after I had met Seth Rollins for the first time. At that time, Brian's jealousy had reached a boiling point. Sal suggested that making a scene on TV would make Brian realize how ridiculous his jealousy was.

"Don't feel guilty. It's not your fault. I went along with it," I told him. Although we were both partially responsible or the idea, I should've never agreed to go through with something like this.

"I'm sure Brian will be fine in a few hours. He'll get over it. He always does," Sal assured me.

"I hope so. I didn't think he would get so angry either," I told Sal.

"I haven't seen him this upset over a punishment since we through a bunch of tarantulas on him," Sal said.

"I remember that. Brian was pretty messed up after that one," I said.

I started to think back and remember how Brian was reacted after the tarantula punishment. When he came home that night, he was basically traumatized and still shaking after what they had done to him. After thinking about that night, I started to feel an extra wave of guilt for being involved in this punishment. I felt so stupid and careless for being the reason that he was in this kind of emotional pain again. I'm supposed to be his best friend. I shouldn't be the one putting him through something like this. I felt like such a bitch.

"Sal, what if he breaks up with me over this? I acted like a total whore today and embarrassed him in front of all these people," I asked him.

"Jess, he's NOT going to break up with you. It's just a punishment. He's been upset with us before. He's yelled at us, and then he gets over it. That's just part of the whole deal. I wouldn't have asked you to do something like this if I thought it would put your relationship at risk," Sal promised me.

"But this whole thing is so stupid. I should be apologizing to him," I said.

I started to reach for my phone to call Brian, but Sal stopped me.

"I wouldn't do that, Jess."

"Why not? I'm the one who fucked up. I should be apologizing to him."