Loyalty

Chapter 18: Dream.

Jessica's POV

I woke up Sunday morning, feeling absolute bliss like I've never felt before. I woke up with Brian's strong arms wrapped around me. He made me feel so protected and loved. Each time I rolled away, even slightly, he would pull me back, closer towards him. He wasn't even awake yet. Even in his sleep, he was trying to minimize the distance between us. But I didn't mind, because there was no place I'd rather be than right there, in his arms.

My back was to him, but I was trying to turn around so I could face him. But that was proving to be quite difficult with his tight grip around me. Eventually, I was able to wiggle my way around, so I could look at him. He still wasn't awake yet, so I took a minute to just stare at him, admiring my handsome boyfriend.

Boyfriend. That word was still so weird to say. We spent so long trying to hide our feelings from one another. But now I could proudly proclaim that he was mine. My constant moving must've distributed him because he was starting to wake up.

"Jess, is that really you?" Brian mumbled. He had barely opened his eyes yet.

"Yes, Brian. Did you expect somebody else to be naked in your bed right now?" I joked with him.

"No. But you have no idea how many times I've imagined this moment. I just can't believe it's actually happening right now. It feels like a dream," he told me.

"Brian, I'm here. I'm all yours," I told him. I kissed him gently on the cheek, causing a huge smile from him.

"Can I ask you something?" he asked, with some hesitation.

"Of course, Brian. Anything," I told him.

"At what point did you decide that we were going to.... Transition to more than friends?" he asked me.

"When I read your letter," I told him.

After my conversation with Brian the previous morning, I felt uncertain about whether or not I should listen to my heart, and go for it with Brian. But after he left, I went out into my living room and found his letter laying on my kitchen table. He never told me that he wrote it, so he must've left it without even realizing it. The letter made me recognize how much Brian truly loved me, and that I would've been crazy not to go for it with him.

"Oh... I forgot I left that here. When did you read it?" he asked me.

"Right after you left yesterday," I told him.

"So... before our date?" he asked.

"Yes."

"Wait. You're telling me that I went through the entire date, feeling so nervous and unsure of myself, but you knew the whole time?" he asked me.

"You didn't know it yet, but you had me before the date even started."

"Then you were just teasing me the whole night?"

"Brian, I've been teasing you for almost five years. I figured one more night wasn't that much of a difference," I told him, somewhat jokingly.

Now I was starting to feel slightly guilty about it. But I still wanted to just be with Brian, and hang out like we used to. That part never changed.

"That's not nice, Jess," he told me.

"Well, maybe you didn't COMPLETELY have me before the date. I knew that I loved you. But it had been so long since we just hung out, I wanted to make sure that we could still have that friendship, even if we were a couple," I explained to him.

I felt that if this relationship was ever going to work, that we needed to maintain that friendship we used to have. The one that we lost when we were apart. I needed to be sure we could get it back, before jumping into a relationship with Brian. But once I saw that we were able to laugh and joke with each other like we used to, I knew that I was all in.