i wanna take my heart to the end of the world, fly away tonight
i stared at the wide range of kids talking with each other or amongst their groups, as I contemplated whether or not to try and pass through them to get to the cafeteria.
i was sick.
i felt so sick i was about to turn around and forget about eating lunch because it would've just came right back up.
No
i thought to myself. im not gonna let this stupid anxiety win.
they're just nerves. its all in your head.
i sucked in a deep breath and marched right up to the line of kids getting their food and drinks.
some were so short, they only came up to my waist or some looking about 7feet tall.
im a short, weak structure ready to collapse.
there's no strength left to hold everything up yet i havent fallen over.
i have no posture; i have no positive energy in me to radiate. maybe that's why everyone is almost as drained as i am.
almost
they have at least 5% more of a will to live than me. they're brighter than me.
they're better than me.
====
there weren't too many confident people here.
Before i could stand in the line, the boy i saw just a few hours ago with the amber eyes and short brown hair, reached out to touch my arm.
just as i felt a hand touch my arm, i instantly flinched away and turn to see him.
"oh-hey, um sorry..," he slightly stuttered and shrugged.
"its just i saw you in the bathroom and you literally looked like you just woke up, so i was wondering why you were there?"
the last part came out like a question as i could feel his nerves radiating off of him.
is he saying that just to make a conversation?
"i'd ask you the same thing; it was the girls' bathroom," i remarked with a slight smirk.
"oh.. er-," he stammered, slightly scratching his arm.
i gave him a smug expression.
yeah you pervert.
"i had to clean the bathrooms because i got in trouble." he lightly laughed.
"oh,," i said slightly confused, "what the hell did you do ?"
"i got in a fight with someone." he said like it was nothing.
"what? why?" i ask slightly intrigued. how could he fight someone ? he looks like a fucking twig.
"a guy was talking about a sensitive topic and it set me off."
YOU ARE READING
till i get back
Fanfic(Warning: mentions of suicide, self harm, mental illness, and eating disorders) she ran away to create her own world. a world of peace from the chaos, a world of stillness. until she found someone who was somebody; who was human. her soul was alr...
