[Pandora]
“I am an idiotic noodle." I said to Arabella, even though it was muffled by the sheets I was currently face-down on.
"Why are you an idiotic noodle?"
"I drank too much and I bet my boyfriend is gonna annoy me through my hangover and ask where I got my tan."
"If you want, I'll stop him downstairs and tell him not to come up. That we went to a party and you're hungover."
"Please?"
"Will do. You're phone dinged. I bet that's him texting you."
I picked my head up long enough to throw her my phone before burying my face again.
"Two texts. One from Kitty: 'Still hungover?' and one from Fletcher; 'On my way over, babe.'"
"Tell Kitty to fuck a cactus, and don't reply to Fletcher. Please go down and tell him nicely to fuck off."
"Okay."
She walked downstairs, my phone in her hand. I didn't even care.
A few minutes later, she came back up with Fletcher behind her, talking loudly.
"What do you mean she drank too much at a party. She's the designated driver! And she never goes to a party without me. What if some douche tried to get in her pants and wouldn't take no? What ab-"
"FLETCHER! I was with her damn it. I drove. And nobody hit on her. The only guys there were just friendly."
As this was happening in the hall, rather loudly I might add, I pulled my pillow over my head.
"Okay, riddle me this, where was this party?"
"Alpha Beta. We went to an Alpha Beta party."
"Wait, another sorority?"
"Yes! We didn't go to seven frats to get fucked six ways from Sunday by guys we didn't know. So please, leave and shut the fuck up. I bet she hears you, and I bet she's not grateful for your loud mouth."
I heard her open the door, slip in, shut it and lock it. I almost sighed in relief until a loud, persistent pounding started on the door.
I promptly stood up, hit back until it stopped, then screamed through it.
"Fletcher, leave! Please promptly fuck off because I am hungover and I have a migraine. I know where you sleep and I will cut off your dick."
For a minute I heard silence, presumably where he was stunned, and it was beautiful. Then, I heard his footsteps retreat from the door.
I returned to the sweet embrace of my bed.
I need to learn to hold my alcohol...
