What About You? Well, What About Me?

Chapter 5 - Bitter-Sweet

{Dean}

I wake up as the sunlight shines through the blinds of the window. My eyes slowly open and a smile comes to my face as I inhaled the sweet scent of my angel. He is resting beside me, his face has such a peaceful look. I get out of bed carefully since I do not wish to wake him. I leave our room and walk towards the kitchen. There, I find Sammy sitting at the kitchen table with a cup of coffee in his hands.

I look around, he's alone. Where's Lucifer? "Morning, Sammy." I say as I walk towards him. He doesn't look at me.

"Morning, Dean." I prepare myself a cup of coffee and sit down in front of him.

"So... where's Luci?" Sammy lets out a chuckle.

"Do I look like a babysitter?" I shrug at him and grab a cup of coffee. He sighs. "I think he's around back." I nod and walk out the back door. Lucifer is sitting at the base of a tree, looking out over the lake behind our house. I walk up and lean against the tree next to him.

"Hello, Luci."

"Hi Dean." I sigh and fight to get the difficult words out of my mouth. I hate asking for help and I hate thanking people. Especially dick angels.

"I-" I start and Lucifer turns slightly and looks up at me. "I-Thank you. For-for saving me." I force out. He just nods.

"How is your brother?" He instead asks.

"Uh, fine I guess, he's just in the kitchen, if you, ya know...wanna talk to him." I say. He laughs a little.

"I know exactly where he is, Dean. But he does not want to talk to me, I presume. Not after last night..." He trails off and looks back over the water. I wonder what happened last night, but decide not to push my luck. As I walk back to the house, Sam and my angel are discussing something. They stop their conversation as soon as I walk in.

{Sam}

I'm sitting staring blankly into my coffee when my brother walks in. "Hey Sammy.", he says. I don't even bother looking up, just simply replying.

"Morning Dean."

"So where's Luci?", he asks with seriousness in his voice. Wait...why is Dean asking where Luci is? Doesn't Dean hate Luci? The accident must've messed him up. I chuckle slightly and say.

"Do I look like a babysitter?" All Dean does is shrug. A normal brother would've gotten pissed at me for being smart when he did nothing wrong. Why should I be a dick to Dean when I'm the confused one?? I let out a sigh and say, "I think he's around back." Dean walks out and I just continue staring into my coffee. I look up and see Luci sitting at the base of a tree....the first thing I notice are his lips...how they had gracefully touched mine. I won't lie to myself...I was begging for it....his face being so close...it was torture. I keep looking at Luci, until I hear, "Hey Sam. Where's Dean?" It's my soon-to-be brother-in-law.

I clear my throat and look at my coffee again, "He's uh, talking to Luci. He came in here looking for him. I think the accident messed him up some.", I chuckle trying to shove off any sign that I was in deep thought.

"Or he wanted to thank him for saving his life. Now, what's going on with you and Luci? Both of you have been acting very peculiar." Cas says. I look out of the window then at Cas.

"If I tell you....you can't tell Luci or Dean ok??", I say hesitantly.

"Sure.", he simply says before taking my coffee and sipping it.

"Luci kissed me...." I say, then I look up to see his expression before I continue. Its completely nonchalant. "I think I love him Cas....but I'm so confused. I don't know-.", I say, but Dean walks in and both Cas and I look at him calmly.

"Uh, what's going on in here?" Dean says as he arches his eyebrow.

"Oh nothing. Just a little guy chat as you say. Now can you make me toast?? Your toaster scares me after last time....you should've told me it pops out." Cas says to his fiancé. I chuckle at the sass Cas shows towards my brother. Man do I love that angel sometimes.

{Lucifer}

I turn my attention back to the lake. When I had turned my head to see Dean, I had seen Sam looking out the window towards us. I don't know why he looked out at us, but there was a look in his eyes... I shook my head.

Sam doesn't love you. He hates you.

I repeat that to myself over and over again but it doesn't seem to sink in. After a while I find myself looking up at the sky. The day is clear, with a few clouds and birds flying around. I then remember how things used to be so easy... long before the creation of these mud monkeys.

My mind then returns to the human who stole what was left of my heart. I have never denied it nor will I ever. I love Sam. He's perfect. Though broken or as wicked as he may have seemed in the past, he is perfect to me... I love his smile. His eyes. His soul. His everything.

I let my head rest back, lightly resting on the tree's trunk. If Sam could remember what truly happened in the cage... maybe things would be different. I close my eyes, as those memories began to flood in.

Sammy had chosen family. Michael, Sam and I then found ourselves locked in the cage again. I was mad, of course I was. But Michael... Michael was furious. Then Castiel came and took Sam's body, forcing me out and leaving me a bit weak. I was happy for a while until I noticed Sam's soul had been left behind... and that's when the nightmare began.

{Castiel}

So...Sam loves my brother, sorta. And Luci very obviously loves him. I abruptly stand up just as Dean is placing my toast in front of me. "Hey where do you think you're going, mister? I just made this for you!" But I ignore him, even though it will hurt him. I just want the tension to leave this place. I walk outside and seat myself indian style in front of my big brother. He looks at me and I can see the pain and sorrow in his eyes.

"I know... that you love Sam. And that's ok, because Sam loves you as well. Do not doubt his love. He is merely....confused." I tell him, and a tear falls from his eye before he quickly wipes it away.

"Why would you think Sam loves me?" He asks harshly.

"Well... he told me." I lean closer and whisper in his ear. "I was not supposed to talk about it to you or Dean, but he thinks he loves you. Convince him." And then I walk back inside to a hurricane. Dean is tearing the place apart to try and find his store of alcohol he has hidden everywhere. The one I drank dry yesterday because I could hear the angel radio. I just want to be an angel again.

Sam is yelling at Dean to leave the alcohol alone. I quickly intervene. I grab Dean and lead him by the hand to our bedroom, and we don't come out for a while...