Love Is Symphony |✓

| 33 |

I woke up to the feel of your soft lips traveling the line of my bare shoulder. A shudder made its way to my body, starting from my arms all the way down to the soles of my feet. The kind of shiver that reminded of last night and how you proved me that you loved me. I smiled.

Your grinning face was the first thing I saw when I opened my eyes, and I couldn't have chosen a better sight to wake up to. Your eyes that I've always loved were sparkling with adoration, your cheeks flushed from the warmth of the early morning, your lips that were red from my kisses... how I wish my everyday was like this—with you pressed up so close to me, our bodies bare underneath the thin covers and your fingers tracing my skin. Look at how different we were from last night at the party. I wish we could always be like this.

Reaching out, I let my fingertips touch the soft skin underneath your eye, the very same spot that your lashes loved to caress every time you blinked. "I love you. Good morning," I said and you chuckled. You took my hand and weaved your fingers right through the spaces where they belonged.

Smiling, I watched the way our hands mold together, taking in small details, and I realized: they didn't fit perfectly. My hand was sweaty and small, while yours was rough and big, but then, it didn't matter. No, it didn't at all. Because it wasn't how it fit that was important, it was the feeling that it brought me. And that feeling where my stomach held an army of butterflies that marched to every part of my body, imprinting their wings to my soul... that was the feeling I would never exchange for.

"Good morning," you said. Your voice was hoarse and your hair was falling over your eyes. Your smile stretched wider into a satisfied grin and you let your words drop to a soft whisper that brought me shivers. "I love you too."

I took a deep breath and closed my eyes, letting your words sink in right through me as I anticipate that warm and fuzzy feeling that I was sure would follow. Sean, let me tell you a secret. Every time you'd tell me you love me, a feeling of contentment always followed the words. It was like the first sun rise that ever kissed my cheeks after a storm. It was that feeling that always made me think that it was worth it.

"I'm sorry," you said after awhile and I opened my eyes. "I'm sorry that I couldn't be honest with you. Sorry that I hurt you."

If I heard those very same words last night, things would've been different. I would've hit you across the face and walked out, spewing profanities along the way. But today was a different story. Others would say that it was just the sex talking, but it was more than that. Last night, with you above me and my arms curled under yours, I realized one thing—I loved you. I loved you, I loved you, I loved you. And maybe that was enough. Yes, it did hurt, but maybe you deserved another chance. Maybe I deserved another chance at love. Maybe I deserved someone who would love me.

Yes, I was broken, but at least you haven't left me. You were still there. You weren't like the rest, and that was enough for me to hold on a little tighter than I did before.

Finally, after years of always being left behind, I finally knew what it felt to have someone run after me. Finally, someone feared of living a life without me. Finally, I wasn't just a memory anymore. I was finally a living experience, not a nostalgic moment that tickled old feelings.

I was now. Present. Not past. Not before. But now.

"Yes. You're forgiven," I whispered.

So, yes, Sean, you really were forgiven. Because you may be the hurricane the ruined me, but you were also the first sunlight that shone for me. And as you began to show me your gratitude through a deep kiss that I knew would have us as one again, I knew that I didn't regret accepting you again.