June

2

"Good morning." Jasmine greeted me as soon as my shoe's sole touched the restaurant's tiled floor.

"Good morning." Ako

"Aga mo naman ata, you are 40 minutes early." Sabi niya after she gazed at her wrist watch.

"Wala lang, maaga lang nagising. Masama ba?" Me while putting on my vest.

"O sya, do your job already. Sayang bayad sayo." Pabiro niyang sabi, sabay tawa.

"Mukhang madami dami customers natin ngayon ah? Ang aga palang ang dami na nila." Sabi ko.

Wala naman bago sa araw ko ngayon. Except that medyo may pagka busy at aligaga dahil nga sa dami ng customer.

It's already 2:38 in the afternoon. Mga ilang oras na din after ko makapag break. But still, dagsa pa din ang customers. Masarap naman talaga mga pagkain dito sa resto. Resto to nang mommy ni Jasmine. Siya yung nagsisilbing manager neto. Pero para na din siyang serbidora. Ganyan siya ka hands on sa negosyo ng mommy niya.

He has a brother. Same as my age. I've heard he's got his eyes on me. But he never really approached me or something, kaya until now, we are still strangers to each other. And besides, nakakahiya din yun kay Jasmine. Eventhough close na din naman kami kahit papaano, nakakahiya pa din, anak at kapatid siya ng mga may-ari netong resto. So bakc-off ako. And for the record, he's never my type. I want the loud, cocky ones, the f*ckboi type. Hahaha!

The restaurant is quite nice. Parang pang mayaman yung ambiance kahit afford naman siya ng lahat. Semi fine dine ang eksena dito, kung may ganun man. And malapit to sa mga universities, so baka malugi sila if pamamahalan nila ng malala yung mga pagkain. Strategy din to attract people to eat here.

Sometimes-- maybe not sometimes, more like palagi-- I get a lot of stares from many girls here. Di lang nila alam. I have my eyes on their boys. Lol. Nabuksan yung sexual side ko when I went out of my family's shadow. Nung naglayas ako I met this boy, a man rather. His name is Carl. He was fine, very fine. Never have I expected he would lay down his brown, hazelnut eyes on me. Yung Johnson na di alam gagawin. Walang kaalam alam kung saan siya pupunta, kung ano gagawin.

I was crying that night sa loob ng kwarto ko. I have been like this since umamin ako sa family ko about sa sekswalidad ko. Marami akong narinig na mga masasakit na salita. Panlalait, pagkamuhi, pandidiri. Sa akin naman okay lang kahit araw araw ko marinig yun sa iba, pero yung tipong sa mga magulang mo mismo manggagaling. Ang sakit pala. Ang sakit sakit. Yung kuya mong inaasahan mo na dadamay at tutulong sayo, ayun, kasama nilang bumabato iyo ng mga salitang hindi deserve matanggap ng kahit nino man.

I decided to pack my things. I grabbed my bag. Took the things I needed the most. Packed it inside my pack. I went out of our house easily. They should hire new guards. For theit safety.

I got some bills from my allowance. My dad is quite generous pagdating sa pera. When we were kids, kahit ano gusto namin bilhin, okay lang sa kanya. As long as we were happy. It's true, he's not the person you'll think first kapag mga convo and salitaan na ang criteria. But he is a lovable father. Money was never a problem for me, for my kuya or for our family. Because my dad provides for it.

For a second year college student, malaki laki din tong pera kong nakuha from my allowance. This will last me, maybe, two months. One and a half, yeah. One and a half.

I rented a very small apartment near my school. It's not very spacious. And I can't remember how I found this little of a room. Well, i'll have to get used to it. Dito nako maninirahan.

Sinadya ko talagang dito pumubta after ko maglayas. Hoping they will find me. Malapit lang to sa school ko, so alam nila agad saan ako pumunta. But they never tried to find me, not shocking at all. I still have contact there. I have my nana when I was a kid na nagtatrabaho pa din doon. And she loves me. I wish siya nalang nanay ko. She is maybe not well of monetarily, but she loves every single child she had, no matter who they are and what they want, she will still support them.

"Hello nana. Good evening. Kamusta po." Sagot ko sa tawag ni nana.

"Mabuti naman ako anak, bumalik ka na dito anak, nag aalala na ako sayo ng sobra. Okay ka lang ba diyan? Kumakain ka ba ng tama? Baka naman napapabayaan mo na yang kalusugan mo." Tumulo agad ang mga nagraragasa kong luha. I wish my mother could be this concern to me.

"Oo naman na, ako pa ba? Kamusta sila mommy? Hinahanap ba nila ako?" May kungting pag asa ang natitira sa akin baka sakaling hanapin ako nila mommy.

"Sorry anak, hindi eh. Ako nga ay nagugulumihanan at kaya ka nilang tiisin ng ganyan. Naaawa ako sayo anak." Hay. Ano pa nga ba?

"Sige na. Baba ko na po to. Iidlip na po ako eh. Basta Na ha, yung napagusapan natin. Wag niyo po sasabihin kung nasaan ako Na ha. Ba bye po. I love you Na." Binaba ko na agad ang tawag. Hay buhay. Guess alone na talaga ako nito officially.

As I was living my life outside my family's influence, unti unti ko na din naka sanayan ang mag isa. Mahirap pag una, pero after a week nasanay na din ako. There is no place para mag inarte at umiyak. Ang dami jan mas malala pa sa problema ko ang dinadala pero kinakaya nila.

Habang naglalakad ako sa kalye para mag pa photocopy ng requirements ko to get a job, may nabangga akong lalaki.

"Hey, mga ingat ka nga." Sabi niya while looking down on me.

Ang tangkad niya. I was astonisehed by his hazelnut eyes. Parang nangungusap. Naka paka expressive ng mata niya. Nakaka adik pagmasdan. It was mesmerizing yet so dangerous. His brows are bushy and very manly, mas pinapaganda pa ang appearance ng mga mata niya. His pouty, cherry-red lips that will bring you to heaven kapag nalasahan mo. Ang matangos niyang ilong na perfectly shaped.

"I'm sorry." Sabi ko at dirediretsong lumakad at nilagpasan na siya ng tuluyan. Hindi pa man din ako nakakalayo ay tinawag na niya ako.

"Teka!"