Hey guys, someone in my class today brought something up. You know how I talk about my Dad and his death a lot? A close friend pointed out that it seems like I want pity when I talk about it, but another close friend explained some people grieve slower and the grieving process is different for everyone and that when I talk of my dad and his death, it helps me and gives me closure. The conversation reduced me to tears, but I hid the tears. If I cry at school, I'll get yelled at and judged, but now I see why that happens. It looks like I'm trying to absorb as much pity as I can from people.
Do I talk about Dad and his death to earn pity or to help me cope? Regardless, because it looks like I'm trying to gain pity, maybe I should just keep my big, fat beak shut until I figure out why I do this. Maybe it's a different reason altogether.
I don't want to look like or be some monster who feeds on other people's pity for fun or any other reason. I don't want to look like that in your eyes and I don't want to do that to any of you, so I made a questionnaire. This questionnaire isn't meant to sap all the pity from you. It's meant to prevent me from sapping pity from you, especially if I already do that, and if I do, I'm sorry. I'm not sure why I'd do such a horrendous thing and to be honest, I wasn't aware of it before and I don't know why I do it. I never stopped to think about it.
Do you guys think I talk about Dad and his death to feed off your pity or to cope with my loss?
Please comment your opinion below because...I need to know. I don't want to be the monster that feeds off your pity and I don't want to seem that way in your eyes.
1. It seems like I am constantly hearing Jas whine about her father's death as though she's trying to gain something from it, and not in a good way.
Yes
No
Sometimes
A lot of the time
Some of the time
2. Jasmine seems to be hurting from a lot of things, including her father's death and is desperate for any way to cope with them, so she looks to those close to her, in person or online, to help her out. Her loved ones appear to be the only living beings she trusts to help her get through this.
Yes
No
Sometimes
A lot of the time
Some of the time
3. Jasmine has been doing either:
A. a lot of taking and not enough giving
B. a lot of giving and not enough taking
C. an equal amount of taking and giving
She has been taking too much from us.
She has been giving too much away.
She has been doing her fair share of taking and giving.
She takes a little too much from us sometimes.
A lot of the time, she takes too much from us.
Some of the time, she takes too much from us.
She gives a little too much away at times.
She gives to people waaaaaaaaay more than she should.
She gives too much to others some of the time.
She takes and gives an equal amount occasionally. She could take and give more equally.
She takes and gives equally most of the time, but sometimes, she either gives more than she takes or takes more than she gives, then everything is thrown off balance.
YOU ARE READING
"Diary" of an Autistic
Non-FictionHi. I'm Jas, and in case you didn't know, I am autistic. I have Asperger's Syndrome. I'm writing this book just so I can jot some of my thoughts down, and so you can see what it's really like to be autistic, well, for me at least. My best friend mad...
