Amnesia • hemmings

0.9

"You don't have your sweater on." She said, smiling as we walked outside.
"I don't wear it at home." I shrugged.
We sat down in the green grass at my house, and I laid back, sighing.
"What?" She laid down beside me.
"I like outside."
"I do too." She giggled, poking my side.
"You're weird." I laughed, poking her side. She freaked out and screamed, practically flying a few feet to the side. "You're really ticklish, aren't you?"
"Yes, so stop." She giggled.
I rolled over so I was closer her, and I was laying on my stomach. "What if I don't want to?"
"Luke." She gasped, knowing what I was about to do.
I grabbed her sides, pulling her closer to me. I flipped us over so that she was laying on top of me. I started tickling her sides, and she was yelling for me to stop. She flipped us over again and I held her in her place, still tickling her.
"Luke!" She yelled trying to turn away from me.
"Scream my name." I said and raised my eyebrows quickly, stopping for a couple seconds.
"Oh my god!" She yelled. I kept on tickling her for a while, and when I stopped, she almost couldn't breathe.
"Luke I hate you so much."
"No you don't."
"Yes I do."
"Then you would get mad if I did this." I said, pulling her on top of me again. I kissed her on the cheek quickly, and she smiled. Then, when I was about to kiss her other cheek, she turned her head quickly, and I kissed her lips. "Sneaky, sneaky, Ms. Irwin..." I laughed.
"I still hate you." She said, but she couldn't hide the smile on her face.
"Then why are you smiling so big?" I asked innocently.
"Shut up." She said sarcastically.
"I love you too." I laughed.
"So what do you want to do?" She asked, sitting up.
"I don't know." I said, sitting up next to her.
"I hate being bored."
"Let's walk around." I shrugged, but didn't stand up.
"Where would we go?"
"I don't know, around the neighborhood? Maybe we can walk to Starbucks, I have money."
"You like Starbucks?" She sounded surprised.
"Yeah, is it weird that a guy likes Starbucks?" I shot back at her, smiling.
"Are you like some white girl that goes to Starbucks every day?" She asked sarcastically, grabbing the chip I had in my hand and eating it.
"Psh, no." I laughed, grabbing another chip.
"Oh my god, Hemmo. You are?!" She yelled, starting to laugh.
"Maybe?" I said like a question.
"Oh my god, you are!!"
"Okay, fine, I am!!" I yelled, and she burst into laughter. She rolled over in the grass and lay there holding her stomach, laughing. She was struggling to breathe, and I sat up with my arms crossed, smiling. I was about to start laughing at how funny she thought all of this was. I moved next to her and grabbed her arms, holding her still. She was still out of breath, laughing her ass off. "Stop laughing!"
"You're- You-"
"Vivian!" I yelled.
"I'm trying to- to stop l-laughing but I- I can't-"
"Oh my god." I groaned, then I pulled her forward and connected our lips. She immediately stopped laughing, and I pulled back quickly. "That got you to stop."
"You're a white girl."
"No I'm not, I'm a guy."
"You're a white boy." She stifled a laugh.
"At least I'm not an asshole."
"Are you calling me an asshole?"
"No, I'm calling what's his name an asshole."
"What's who's name?"
"That one guy."
"That is no help, Hemmo."
"We were talking about him on the way home!"
"Nate?"
"Yes! Nate! At least I'm not an asshole like Nate."
"Whatever, are we going to walk around or not?" She asked, standing up.
"Do you want to go to Starbucks?"
"Yes."
"Are you going to make fun of me?"
"I'll try my hardest not to." She smiled.
"Fine, we'll go to Starbucks." I grinned, standing up.
On the walk there, we never thought about seeing people from school, we just talked and laughed as we walked down the street to the Starbucks that was a few blocks away. We never worried about seeing anybody that would look at us weird, never thought about people from school taking pictures and showing everybody.
"Why did you kiss me?" I asked after a few seconds of silence between us.
"I don't know." She shrugged.
"Do you just kiss people all the time?" I laughed, looking down at her.
"No." She giggled.
"Well then why did you kiss me?"
"Well, let's see. Why did I kiss you? I never really thought about it. I don't know, I saw what everyone was doing to you and I felt bad so I started talking to you, and I could tell you liked me because you only smiled when you were with me. I started to like you too, because, let's face it, you're hot. And I like when you smile, and laugh, and I liked hanging out with you. And when I found out your mom did that, and I saw you were sad, I didn't like it. You had your shirt off too, I thought that was really hot." She laughed. "And, I thought it was the perfect chance, since I knew it would make you feel better, and I liked you, and you liked me, and no one could see us, and you were already shirtless... So I kissed you. That's why." She smiled.
"So you like me?" I smirked.
"Yes I like you, you idiot."
"Date me."
"Did you just ask me to be your girlfriend?"
"Oh, did I not do it right? Okay, sorry. Vivian Irwin, will you be my girlfriend?" I stopped and turned to face her, grabbing onto one of her hands.
"Luke..."
"Oh."
"No. I mean, don't say oh. I'm just... I don't want the people from school-"
"Oh, I get it. I'm a loner and a weirdo and people wouldn't like it if they saw us together. Then they would make fun of you for being with me and they wouldn't like you and I know you wouldn't like that. You just don't want to be seen with me, it would hurt your reputation. Whatever, you still have that asshole that we were talking about earlier, Nate." I let go of her hand.
"No, Hemmo-"
"Vivian, what else would the reason be?" She tensed up when I used her full name. "It's obvious you like me, and it's obvious I like you. The problem is your dumb friends. I feel like every single person at that school wouldn't like the idea of us dating, except for Natalie, maybe. I know you wouldn't like that because you're Vivian Irwin and you get everything you want, and when one little thing goes wrong you freak out. Nobody ever makes fun of you, hates on you, nothing, because you're so perfect. Damn, I don't even know why I tried, I knew this would happen." I started to walk away.
"Luke, don't-" She tried grabbing my arm, but I pulled away.
"No!" I yelled and she flinched, taking a step back.
"Luke, just listen-"
"Vivian, do you know how important this was to me? I have nothing. Absolutely nothing. My mum hates me, the school hates me, I'm a total loner and everyone knows I cut, I've attempted suicide, I hate my life. You were the only thing that I actually thought would save me. But I guess you don't care enough..." I trailed off, starting to walk away again. Tears were forming in the corners of my eyes, and I tried not to let them fall while I was in front of Vivian. I walked in the direction of my house, and I thought Vivian would try to catch up with me, but she didn't. I didn't hear any footsteps at all, it was like she was just standing there, watching me walk away.
When I got to my house, I did the thing I always do.
I locked myself in the bathroom, cried, and cut.