Every night, when I closed my eyes, his image would be branded to the backs of my eyelids. That same smile, so gorgeous yet so deadly. Those deep blue eyes, like the treacherous oceans you find, the ones which sometimes have those desolate lighthous...
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"Shhh..."
A waterfall of liquid sadness flowed down my face, running tracks down the dirt and leaving pathways where my actual skin could be seen under the dried mud.
I could barely smell the strong cologne he wore; my senses were so fucked up and I was unbelievably disoriented. His dark blue ocean eyes drifted in and out of view as he poured warm water over my body to clean me as I sat with my knees to my chest in the bathtub.
"Have you learnt your lesson?"
I nodded my head yes.
"You will never speak to me in that tone again. Do you understand?"
I nodded my head again, feeling like an uncontrollable bobblehead. My clothes, which were so dirty that they were a murky brown colour, stuck to my body as the water ran rivers over my skin. I'd refused to let Lazarus take them off, though he'd tried to force me. He wanted me to be completely clean, and he told me that if I didn't take my clothes off by the end of the bath, he would sedate me, wash me, then throw me in the pit again. I had paled, and nodded immediately, not wanting to test that promise.
"You will be obedient until I kill you."
I forgot to nod this time, my eyes unfocussed, stuck in the never-ending memories of the almost eternal time I'd spent in that deep dark hole.
My head was suddenly yanked backward as Lazarus grabbed a fistful of my hair and pulled it, and I gasped — but my throat only emitted an agonising rasp. My eyes watered from the pain but my tears were camouflaged with the rivulets of water running down my head, stained a dirty colour from the amount of dirt that was caked onto my body.
"Do you understand?" he hissed.
"Yes," I breathed.
"Good," his face morphed from a furious face to a calm one in an instant, and he let go of my matted hair. I was barely surprised from the sudden change in expression but all thoughts vanished from my head when he ordered,
"Take your clothes off."
My blood went cold. The last time this happened was the last time I was kidnapped and it was horrible. He didn't do anything, he didn't do those things with his victims — but I still felt violated. Bare.
"Now."
With a trembling hand, I slowly removed my clothes, feeling smaller and smaller as his eyes scrutinised my dirty body. As soon as I was completely bare, I brought my knees back up to my chest, trying to cover as much of me as I could.
His laughed.
"Oh, darling Lorelei, no need to be so self-conscious! We're all friends here, aren't we?"
I looked away, feeling more and more naked, more and more dirty, more and more empty and alone and hopeless.
"Anyway, it's nothing I haven't seen before."
Then he laughed another cruel laugh which echoed around the bathroom walls, and the lump in my throat grew as I bowed my head. My straggly, matted hair swung forward and covered the side of my face he could see, and salty despair mingled with the water as I cried, my body shaking from sadness, fear, despair, violation, hopelessness, and everything in between.
A/N
SORRY FOR THE MASSIVE BREAK! Everything's been CRAZYYY what with corona virus cancelling exams in England and all... and I'm self isolating at home. It's been like 5 days and I'm already bored.
Anyway, I'll double update today because I've been gone a while.
How are you guys doing? I wish you all the best for this virus stuff... just, uhhh don't mass buy toilet paper :)
