Resonance (Kakashi x OC, Gaara x OC) -- Book 2

Chapter 27: The Betrayal

When Keiko awoke, Gaara was sleeping next to her in a chair. She sat up and swung her legs over the bed. Her head hurt so bad that she thought she was going to be sick. Gaara awoke with a start when he heard her stumble after trying to stand up.

"Easy, you've been through a lot," he said.

"What..." she sniffed. Her eyes grew wide as she looked up at Gaara. "This scent..."

Gaara sighed. He hadn't thought about that when Kakashi offered to wipe her memory. They weren't going to be able to hide it from her forever.

"He came back a few days ago. Apparently, he's been in a coma for some time. He didn't want to upset you."

Keiko's eyes filled with tears. Now she knew why she felt so conflicted going to Gaara after Kakashi died. Hindsight bias she supposed. She felt like every fiber of her being was being torn every direction. She loved Gaara every bit as much as she loved Kakashi, and now to find out that they both existed in the world together...

Gaara could almost feel the conflict welling up within her. He didn't know what to do. He couldn't stand to see her in so much pain, but at the same time, he couldn't live stuck like this.

"When you're better," he said softly, "I want you to go to him."

"What?" she shot him a look of surprise.

"This is...an unusual circumstance. I know if it were anyone else, I'd never have to worry. But you need to be able to make a choice and make peace with that choice," he said.

"Gaara, you're my husband, I love you," she pleaded meekly.

"I know you do. But you love him too. I can't take you home with me unless your heart is coming too. Whatever happens, I don't want to know. Just...if you come home with me you need to leave it behind."

He got up and left. He didn't think he could stand to be in there another minute. He never drank when he went out, but he thought he might join some of the guys tonight.

After several moments alone, Keiko gathered her strength. She stood up and yanked out the IV. She dressed hurriedly and slid open the window before climbing out into the cold night air. She felt sick to her stomach about what she wanted to do. She was a horrible person.

Kakashi's door was open and he was sweeping out the dust that had gathered in his apartment. They never did rent it out to anyone. His belongings still sat on the bed in the crate Keiko had packed.

"My journal is missing," he said when he heard her walk in.

"I...took it back with me," she said quietly.

"And how did he feel about that?"

"I made the text magically invisible. He never read it. He said he knew you were a part of me and he didn't mind," she said shuffling awkwardly.

"Keiko...I..."

She grabbed him and kissed him. He automatically wrapped her up into his arms. Neither of them were able to hold back. Nearly 20 minutes later clothes covered the floor and he held her naked form close to him.

"I'm a horrible person," she whispered again aloud.

"No, I'm a horrible person. I should have stopped it," he said.

"He told me he wouldn't take me home unless I came to be with you, so I could make my choice."

"Remarkable man. I'd never make you choose."

She looked up into his eyes.

"I'm selfish. Had we been married, I'd want to keep you with me as long as you'd stay. Even if it meant part of your heart was his."

"He wants me to be able to let you go. I don't know if I'm a good enough person to do that."

"I'd be lying if I said I didn't want you to stay, but you need to go home. I've been asking around. He's good to you and that's all I want. Obviously he's a better man than me if he wants you to make your own choices and be ok. But if one day, something happens to him, you always have a home with me."

Keiko kissed him gently.

"Besides, we'll see each other again. Tsunade-sama is stepping down. She's decided she's done. She went personally on a mission to help take down Danzo. Apparently he's been working with both Orochimaru and the Akatsuki. She said she's had all she can stomach of making decisions for this war. She's going to train healers. I've been chosen to be the new Hokage. They were already going over candidates, and apparently I was on the list before they thought I..."

He looked back at her. "I'm sorry. I will always be here for you and I will always love you. But Gaara's right, you can't give your love to two people at once and really live life."

"I never deserved either of you," she sobbed, "since I've already damned myself, will you love me, one last time?"

"You really want to make it harder for me to let you go, don't you," Kakashi replied, sliding his hands over her body.

Keiko felt horrible when she went to find Gaara the next morning. She felt dirty. She had been tainting their marriage with her feelings for Kakashi since the day she said "I do." She should leave this world and start somewhere else. She was so ugly and weak on this world.

She sat down under the oak tree by the water and watched it ripple as bugs skipped across to surface, trying to stay away from the hungry mouths below. She pulled her knees to her chest and leaned her chin between them. This whole love business always made her feel like an immature child. In all of her years, she never experienced this until she met Kakashi, and now Gaara. She couldn't even do what was best for them. She didn't deserve to have it.

Gaara came up and sat next to her. "Now I know why I never drink Sake," he said, rubbing his temples. Keiko leaned her head on his shoulder and he put his arm around her.

"I don't deserve you," she said quietly. "I never deserved either of you. It would really be best for everyone if I left this world, but I'm too weak to even do that."

Gaara said nothing.

"You've given me everything and I've never given you the love you deserve, but if you will let me come home after all I've done, I promise I will do my best to try and be the wife you deserve."

"You've always been everything I wanted. You came to the village because it's what the council wanted, not because you were in love with me, but we fell in love anyway. I know that the situation with Kakashi was unusual, but you gave me your love. Whatever you were feeling inside, I didn't feel like you were dragging baggage into our marriage. When you were with me, you were only with me. I don't want to know about anything last night, but if you are willing to leave it in the past, I want you to come home."

"I never tell you enough how much I love you Gaara," she choked he said as he held her tight.