Rants on Twilight.

Rant on Twilight: The Hype!

So, I feel like crap, and I'm bored shitless. Also, I think I may have a bug that's going around which means I might be a wee bit delusional. In other words, it's time for another Twilight Rant! YAY!! This time, on the whole basic hype of the Saga and how it ruin the face of teenage vampire (And werewolf) fiction.

YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED! MWHAHAHAHAHA!! Just kidding :D

Okay, I read Twilight before the movies came out, and I have to admit, I was once a Twihard fan. Yup, tis true. And I still kinda am. But I did NOT start to like vampires because of it. In my opinion, it RUINED vampires. I mean, what's so scary about a vampire whose eyes change colour? I mean, if I was turned I'd like my eyes to stay brown. And that's because they are a NICE brown....unusual anyway :D So, yeah, it looks very odd, you know? Someone with gold/red/honey coloured eyes. I mean, some people have natural black eyes....ANYWAY! Yeah....the whole eye issue sucks. And then there's the whole sparkling issue.. (I already posted a rant on this, but it's a really obvious and fun rant topic) I mean who likes a guy who SPARKLES?! I mean, I could understand if the girls sparkled because it would help them get some human blood, and looks cool, but with a guy it looks GAY! I mean, not just 'I like guys' gay but, 'I go around shirtless wearing glitter and going to random clubs to have random one-night stands' kinda gay. You know what I mean?

ALSO! I HAVE FOUND THE SECRET TO THE VAMPIRES SPARKLINESS! They use Lush's Shimmy Shimmy Massage Bar! I don't blame them either, it smells fricken fang-tastic (HAH!) and feels great. Have one myself, really keeps skin soft.

BACK ON TOPIC! I can kinda understand why people get defensive over the book Twilight and such...but not over the movie. I mean, who WANTS to see Robert Pattinson (I don't care about his name. It's WEIRD!) kiss some depressed teenager who stalked him? And then nearly kill her....and then save her from a kickass vampire...... Don't see the cinematic appeal. I mean in the books, you could picture them however you wanted. But then in the movie the supposed ballet studio looked more like a church....with mirrors....Lots of mirrors. Music was good though, but because of it loads of good bands are considered to be Twilight Bands and are admired because they were in Twilight and shit. But the scores were good.........

But yeah, can't understand why people got so hyped up over the Twilight film.....and THEN read the books. If anything, the movie snapped me out of the Twilight thrall. That, and better vampire books (Dracula, House of Night, Morganville Vampire, Sookie Stackhouse Series, The Vampire Diaries, Nightword the list goes on people!) So yeah, if you compare Twilight to all of those books, you see that it is just a middle-aged woman bringing a thirteen year old's dream to life.

Then there's the other books. As in, the movie books, or more recently, the Taylor Lautner movie picture book (Or something like that). I mean, the guy is sexy. But you don't need to broadcast his face all over a waste of print book. That's what the internet is for! You know, to find good pictures of hot celebrities and then print them out and stick them to your wall? And then there was that nightmare inducing magazine, "Robsessed" *Shudders* Who in the WORLD considers him sexy? Besides himself, I mean (BUUUURRRRRNNNNN>:D) Wow....so many spelling mistakes in this rant.......wow.....

Anyway, back on track (Stupid fever ><) The werewolves. Now, there was loads of potential to write about the pack. I mean, Stephenie Meyer could've written a little extra book or something about the pack, and how they all imprinted, or first changed, or how they met their soul mate! But nope! It has to all be about boring old, dull, selfish, bitchy, vain Bella. (As you can tell, I hate her fictitious guts) But seriously, I'd love to get an insiders look into the normal day of the pack members! Especially Seth! I love Seth <3 He was so cute! ^.^

Again, sorry for being side-tracked, the other thing that's annoying is the damn propaganda. I mean, the amount of Twilight t-shirts I have seen is unbelievable! The posters I can understand (I have one...technically two) And maybe about 12 kinds of t-shirts, but there is at least 30 different kinds of t-shirt for each film! And they all have stupid quotes, the ones you either remember a lot, or just ignore because they're cheesy. And the buttons....and the hats....and the bags (But we ALL needs bags, so that's ok!) or the little stationary sets. Loads of crap basically, that just makes the hype worse!

Oddly enough (And those who were once Twilight fans will probably agree with me) I can't remember why I liked Twilight so much. I mean, it probably was the whole vampire thing. But I've loved vampires since I was five. Hell, my favourite show was Buffy the Vampire Slayer! So yeah....can't remember why.

The whole purpose here was:

Twilight sucks (Literally. HAH!!)

The main actors suck.

The Saga sucks

I'm sick -_- Oh! And the whole build up and hype completely suck and makes everything a waste of money! And that girls think that their Edward will come, sparkling and all. Actually, all they need to do is buy a Lush product, and then they have Edward (HA! In your face Meyer >:]) OH! And Meyer stole the eye idea from Interview With A Vampire (One of my childhood films! Tis a true fact!)

Oh, and I write weird things when I'm sick........and make probably NO sense! :D