I'll Still Love You (Kaisoo Fanfic)

Chapter 41

Almost a week had passed since Jongin and Kyungsoo had broken up, but that didn't mean the aching in their heart subsided. If anything, the desire to see each other, to feel each other, to hold each other grew with each minute that passed during the day.

At least Kyungsoo had people who looked after him and tried to help him push through the pain of the large void Jongin had left behind in his heart, but Jongin had no one. Every morning, he would wake up to a cold bed with a damp pillow underneath his head, evidence of how much he had cried in his sleep.

Half eaten food started to pile up in his fridge, taking up more and more space until Jongin couldn't fit anymore leftovers in there, not that it mattered since food was the last thing on his mind at the moment.

He always had to stop himself from running over to Chanyeol's condo and enveloping Kyungsoo in a tight hug. Ninety-two percent of the time, Jongin slept, hoping that sleeping could take his mind off of everything and maybe, if he was lucky, he could reunite with Kyungsoo in his dreams. He always did, but not in the way he wanted to. Instead, his reunions with Kyungsoo in his dreams were filled with reminders of why he left Kyungsoo in the first place, and by the end of the dream, he would be reminded of what would happen if he ever tried to get Kyungsoo back.

As the sun greeted the morning, peeking out from the horizon, Jongin opened his eyes to yet another day. His cheeks looked punched in, sickening yellowish-purple bruises having formed on his jaw and right under his cheekbone from when Chanyeol had punched him, and his ribs were too visible to be considered healthy. Jongin's eyes were drooping and he was exhausted, despite having slept for more than half of the day.

He tried to fight it, he really did. For days and days, Jongin tried to forget about Kyungsoo to lessen the pain in his longing heart and everytime the urge to cry hit him like a tidal wave, he tried to suppress it and move on. But this was Do Kyungsoo, the love of his life. If he was being honest, Jongin didn't even remember how his life worked without Kyungsoo. As soon as Kyungsoo had stepped out of his condo with his luggage, every cell in Jongin's body had decided to shut down and stop working. Now, Jongin was nothing but an empty, black hole.

As he peeked through the closed curtains and out his window, his heart ached even more when he realized that it would've been the perfect day to watch the sunrise with Kyungsoo. They could've brewed some coffee, and although Jongin wasn't fond of the drink, he could've made himself some tea and they could've sat by the beach or park their car in the middle of the road to watch the sun rise above the horizon, drinking their steaming hot coffee and tea and bathing in the sunlight.

Pulling the curtain further across the window and making sure that no light was streaming through, Jongin left his room, finding it too stuffy in there. Actually, though, it was too stuffy. He hadn't showered in days and he had no strength to change the clothes that were currently glued to his body with his own sweat.

As he entered the kitchen—knowing quite well that he wasn't going to eat anything, but just needed something to do—he yanked the fridge door open and peered inside, yet nothing caught his eye. Slamming the fridge door shut, Jongin exited the kitchen and unceremoniously dropped onto the couch and laid down, too tired to crawl back into his bedroom and sleep on his bed.

With memories of Kyungsoo, and the younger's laugh ringing in his ears along with his smile replaying in his mind, he fell into a deep slumber, tears soaking into the pillow underneath his head.

~~~

After hearing Jongin's side of the story, Baekhyun's anger towards Jongin had been forgotten and instead had been directed at his father.

"How could someone's father be that closed-minded? No wonder Jongin was a mess when I first met him," Baekhyun spat under his breath and shook his head. "I feel sympathetic for the poor boy. How did he manage to survive all these years without any freedom?" The only answer Baekhyun got was the unrhythmic breathing from Kyungsoo who was sleeping next to Baekhyun, the poor boy having finally fallen asleep.