Outdoor Love

6. Conciliate

Barracuda and I became friends after I talked to her first. (Forced to! Because we were on the same group.) Grrr! I hated my actions. It was like I said sorry for the wrong things she had done to me. Was I too weak? That time Barracuda and I usually went to the library. Not to study. I didn't know about her but I went there because I discovered a new target, Nagel. He is a third year student working in the library. Cute eyes. Why do I love eyes? (heart heart...suddenly, I remember his cute smile) 

Barracuda was top three in our class. I didn't know her opportunistic personality took control of her. She became close friends with my Outlet of Secrets (OS). What did my OS do? Betray of course. She thought that Barracuda was my other outlet because we got very close. Well, all the beans were spilled...including the information of my Top Three. For weeks, Barracuda knew my secrets. She became a bridge, a person that connected me to the one I liked...Nagel. Before, I really liked having someone sign my slam book. Barracuda and I strategically asked him to sign it. I knew many things about him. I realized that he didn't want to start a relationship. It wasn't on his mind. While he was answering, Barracuda kept teasing. I tried to hit her feet but I accidentally hit Nagel's. That led to him knowing that I liked him. And from that moment, I kept all my secrets to myself. I rarely go the library. I didn't have an OS anymore.

I didn't want to have gaps with friends. I would like to be open to them, but is it possible that in the first place...there were already gaps? Come to think of it, we can't own things what other people possess. But somehow...we can duplicate what they have, right? May it be the same or in another form? 

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