Peter Parker/Tom Holland Imagines

Dust Part2

You hadn't laughed in weeks. Or even smiled.

Your father's last words were your name, pleading, to save him, you would've, you would've given your soul but you couldn't and it was your fault he became dust.

So of course, it was only right (wrong) that Peter's last words were just as heart breaking and wrenching. 

"I don't wanna go, Mr. Stark, save me, please, I don't wanna go." As if this wasn't enough to, oh gosh, the thought itself sent you crying, but his actually last words were,"I'm sorry." 

Because he thought he disappointed Mr. Stark. 

Because he thought he'd disappointed Aunt May. 

Because he thought he'd disappointed me and Ned and MJ and his true friends.

Because he thought he'd disappointed the world.

Because he thought he'd disappointed his parents. 

Because he thought he'd disappointed his late Uncle Ben. 

"Peter, you idiot!" You scream into your pillow and want some to be there for you and then realise how exceptionally sad it was the person you wanted to comfort you was the same person because of why you had to be comforted and who couldn't do it.

Day, you slept, you cried, you screamed, you broke stuff. Night, you sat on the fire escape and thought and were as silent as possible. Your mother needed the sleep and you were so selfish you couldn't comfort her, she'd lost her past and present, but you'd lost your past, present and future. She'd lost her husband and soulmate, and I'd lost my boyfriend, my soulmate and my father. 'I can't believe I'm comparing.'

You'd think about how you once asked your father when you were 8 what a virgin was and he'd choked and panicked and said it was a girl who hadn't been touched by a man but you sensed something was wrong, so you didn't say that then you weren't a virgin either. 

That's true now. 

You'd think about how Peter had revealed his identity to you, right there, right after you'd kissed each other senseless for the first time.

'I want to kiss him again.' You think.

You thought about begging your father for an Avengers t shirt a couple of years back and he'd ordered something online and you'd given him a hell of a time for buying what he wanted but not what I wanted and then he opened it to show me the tee I'd wanted all along. 

He was the greatest. He wasn't perfect but he was to me. 

You thought about when Peter had been so wounded from a fight, he refused to tell you who the opponent was but he was so hurt and there was so much blood and thank god for the Internet or he would have died. 

It was because of him you had seriously considered a career in nursing for a whole before deciding on writing or journalism.

You thought about watching movies and making fun of them with your father.

You thought of reading and geeking out with Peter. 

You thought of talking about cars and walking around fancy car dealerships with your father, to stare at the cars. Lamborghini Aventador was your favourite. You thought how extremely similar you were, yet how different yet how much of a father-daughter.