Ashes to Ashes: The Female Alpha

Fear Me (pt.13)

"A rouge?" My mate questioned

"That's what I said"

He looked deep in thought before speaking again, "even if you were a rogue, it doesn't prove you know how to take down these rogues."

I let out a humorless laugh, "You know nothing of my life. I killed one of the most dangerous rogues in the world"

"And who would that be?" He asked with curiosity swimming in his electric eyes

Her face comes to mind, "It doesn't matter. What matters is your fighters will be dead in seconds. Our warriors will be able to take down the rogues"

We stayed in the office arguing for three hours about who was to fight when the rogues arrived. Ultimately, Alpha Rush had made some good points. We pride our wolves from the warrior pack for being amazing fighters, yet some of Rush's wolves had taken some warriors down when we fought for our titles. It was hard to acknowledge that he was right, but in the end, protecting our pack is all that matters.

I knew Rush could handle himself, he is a natural born Alpha. He was born stronger and faster than regular wolves. Samuel could handle himself as well. He may not be a born Alpha, but he had all the characteristics of one. I never worried about myself, I knew my potential and strength. I knew I could never die at the hands of a rogue nor a regular wolf, perhaps an Alpha born, but even then, I am still unsure.

I busied myself with documents while Rush made calls to different packs, trying to get any type of information. They only told us that this group of rogues were the most vicious animals they've ever encountered. My mind goes to Walker as the phrase 'Vicious Animal' is said. I remember when Samuel had called him that, but I knew it was an accident. I should've spoken up when I had the chance.

The phone slammed down as his breath came out rapidly. I could feel his irration and anger from my chair.

Suddenly, there isn't a harsh breathing, only hot air beside my neck.

He stood there breathing in my scent, trying to calm himself and his wolf. His eyes found mine, "Was it hard?" He asked

"What," my voice trembled at his close proximity.

"When you killed the rogue"

I took a deep breath, "Yes, it was. I was only eight years old when I killed the rogue"

"Eight years old?" he moves right in front of me, searching my eyes

"It was a forced shift. Alot of things happened that day. When it was the rogue and me, my wolf decided to make an appearance" My wolf begins to whimper as the image of the mangled body pops into my head.

His eyes shined with pity. I don't like it.

A forced shift was the worst pain a wolf could go through. Going through a forced shift means that there was some trauma and danger involved. It usually occurs when your close to death.

I cleared my throat, and looked away from his eyes "Anyways, I need your opinion on something"

He looked at me to continue, as he moved to take his seat.

"I'm assuming the leader of the group of rogues isn't going to make an appearance. Meaning we should take some rogues captive to get information out of them...Samuel will want me to do the interrogation along your side."

"Why you?" He asked

"Its what I'm good at," my eyes shine in pride as my hands tingle with excitement. I was the best when it came to getting information out of people.

"We shall see"

I continued working on the documents while Rush kept calling around. We kept taking side glances at each other. It made multiple questions come to mind.

"Why don't you want me" I said abruptly, while dropping the documents on the table

He looked shocked for a second then pulled his usual cold look, "I already told you. I don't trust-"

"You can learn to trust me" I interrupted, "you and I know that isn't the real reason. I don't understand. We're made to complete each other and make each other happy." The words fell from my mouth like vomit, did I want a relationship with Rush? No! That's absurd.

I could hear the insecurity in my voice. I wanted to stop running my mouth but I couldn't stop. "Is it because of my scars? What? You think I'm ugly because of them? Do I make you feel less of a man because I can hold my own?!" My mind has swam with these questions, questions I always wanted answered but never wanted to ask. Where was this coming from?

He sat there in silence.

My wolf urged me to continue speaking, "I just...I was taught that a mate was bad, and you can learn to trust me, so that isnt the reason. I just want to know the reason." I needed to know, to put my mind at ease and erase all the possibilities that my brain came up with.

I took a deep breath then gathered up the documents in my hands and stood up, when he didnt make a move to speak. "Please excuse my behavior Alpha, it will never happen again" I apologized for my abrupt questioning.

I made my way towards the door, wanting to rid myself of the embarrassment I made of myself. I couldn't believe I let the bond and my curiosity get the better of me.

A tug on my shoulder pulls me from my thoughts. I came face to face with Rush.

"I'm scared" he mumbled

I didn't have time to ask what he meant as his lips pressed against mine in a passionate lock. My eyes were wide in shock, my lips stayed still as I tried to process what was occurring. The documents scattered to the floor as he lifted me into his arms. My legs wrap around him as if on instinct. My back is soon pressed against the wall, and that's when I respond. Rush bites my bottom lip asking for entrance. Which I give without a second thought. The taste of him was overwhelming, I had never felt like this before. My hands went to grip his hair. He released a low growl then went to squeeze my bottom. My wolf began to yip in happiness.

After a few minutes we separated. Looking at each other with a whirlwind of emotions, but only one stood out to me...

"Who are you?" his eyes shining in fear