butterfly lips。『 minjoon 』

two

not edited; (this economy won't allow me to)

》chapter two: a beautiful wonderful curse《

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SOFT lavender butterflies fluttered in the twinkling night sky, glowing prettily like stars. they danced with each other like sparkling ballerinas. jimin watched as these butterflies flew closer and closer to the ground. then they dropped.

jimin was violently awaken to the feeling of something clog up his airways. his lungs were unable to get air, he was gasping and hacking violently but to no avail. he tried breathing and coughing it all out as if he could will this awful feeling out of existence. hot tears stung his eyes painfully, streaming down his cheeks in fat drops. his entire face was red and burning hot. he clumsily hung himself upside down, coughing some more, he could feel bile burn like acid inside his throat. soft lavender and light blue butterflies flew out his throat, others had to be spat out, onto the floor dead.

he wiped his mouth with the back of his hand. he cried out, the painful stab of fear driving deep into his gut.

his entire body was shaking. he felt like he was going to die. jimin flung the covers over his face, whimpering quietly, trying to rid himself of the fear that shook him awake. he closed his eyes, taking large gulps of air, not wanting to feel that horrible feeling again.

then his alarm rang. exactly at 8:25.

he threw the covers off, rubbing his swollen red eyes, with another hand searching for the button. he quickly pressed down on it to kill the noisy tune it screamed so violently. he blinked rapidly, trying to get used to the sun that shined too brightly on a morning such as this.

he got up, nearly stepping on the dead butterfly bodies on the ground. he grabbed the trash can on the side of his drawer, throwing all of them in there with a disgusted look on his face. then the realization hit him, all at once and too sudden.

it made his heart clench and his chest squeeze with hurt.

it is the feeling of not being rejected... rather wronged. not by namjoon, not by taehyung, but the gift the goddess of love had placed upon them.

as jimin takes a look on the dead butterflies in their plastic-y grave, he realized that it's more of a curse than a gift.

he threw a couple of tissues in there, getting up to get ready for work.

he turned to look at the bathroom sink, with his comb idly sitting on top of a towel. jimin grabbed it. he pressed his thumb into the teeth, the fragile plastic bits bending under his will. he slowly combed over his hair, staring at himself in the mirror with red eyes and it feels like the day was going to start out slow. his collar too tight around his neck and his pants felt like they were caging him. he just wanted it to all be over. with an exasperated sigh, he walks out his apartment, looking up at the ceiling as tears line his eyes.

damn the gods for this. damn the goddess haenatov.

after such a long awful day of just analyzing graphs, comparing them with other graphs. trying to find out whether the development project was going to effect the forest nearby, negatively. jimin found himself, once again, in front of taehyung and namjoon, smiling through the pain in his chest that throbbed and screamed to be given attention. to be taken away and be anywhere else but here. it was quite interesting, trading in one awful experience with another.

don't get jimin wrong, he loves his job. just not this aching feeling in his chest that bothered him even when namjoon and taehyung weren't there. his soft soul simply wanted to be anywhere else but attached to namjoon. the very man who was attached to taehyung.

-and gods, they were so perfect it hurt jimin so bad-

taehyung had an ocean swimming in his eyes and glittering gold sprinkled across his cheeks. a perfect fit to the galaxies in namjoon's eyes and the stars dipped inside the craters of his cheeks.

and jimin just had the butterflies and the gardens in his palms, petals on his lips. he felt as if he was nothing compared to the vast greatness they had resting on their tongue.

it was hard, trying to truly be happy for taehyung. not because he wanted namjoon- no. it was because of the truth the both seemed so unaware of. it was hard not to say anything.

a part of jimin hoped it was something else- anything else in fact.

just not this.

jimin had resorted to biting down on his tongue and keeping it all in, no matter how much it hurt. he mustn't tell, he must not scream, he must not feel the hurt in his chest that squeezed around his lungs.

butterflies wanting to crawl out of his throat and jimin wanted to crawl out of his soul.

it was sickening, how cruel the goddess can be, to anyone she wanted to toy with. how she loved to mess with the mere mortals that jimin was. connected to a soul that was supposedly promised to him, a soul destined for him to meet and fall in love with.

maybe it was a mistake, maybe namjoon was truly never meant for jimin.

"hey jimin, are you okay? you seem a little tired there." namjoon asked, with dimples pressing onto the side of his cheeks as his smile painted his lips. jimin's eyes flickered briefly to his lips and then into his eyes, not a hint of recognition.

"i'm... i'm okay. i didn't get enough sleep. that's all." jimin laughed, just a little bit sadly.

"mm, what have you been working on lately?" taehyung asked, resting his elbows on the table as he leaned forward.

"well in work... we've been working with a company, trying to evaluate the development project that is going to take place near the forest." jimin swallowed down the lump that got stuck in his throat and he couldn't look at taehyung without wanting to cry. he loves his best friend so much. taehyung was such a wonderful person. then to see taehyung so happy, made him happy too, but when it's with the person his soul is bound to.

it hurts. not a little. but a lot.

it hurts so fucking much and jimin can't do anything but just watch.

it hurts so much that jimin wanted to hate taehyung, yet that hate could not stay as he watched taehyung giggle, reaching over to push jimin's shoulder back a bit. "no! not about that, about your paintings. you haven't shown me one in a while, so i was wondering if you were working on a big one."

jimin blushed, a small 'o' on his lips. he looked away, nodding. "i have..."

"ah, when you're done. can i see the painting?" namjoon asked, "i've heard from taehyung that your paintings are so good. i heard a lot of good things about you."

jimin smiled lightly at namjoon, "mm, probably embarrassing things too." he let out a soft breath of air, the pain in his chest tightening and butterflies crawling up his throat.

"no no, all good things. i'm glad taehyung has such an amazing person by his side."

jimin blushed but he covered it up by coughing and laughing. he shook his head. "no, tae is the wonderful person here. you're lucky to have him." he placed his hand on taehyung's shoulder.

they talked idly but it was hard to focus on what they talked about. everything happened so fast but everything felt like it was moving so slowly.

when it was time to leave, jimin felt like the weight on his chest felt a bit more heavier. he was tired and all he wanted to do was sleep. he said his goodbyes swiftly, leaving without taking another glance at the happy couple.

ughh it's so damn late.
school's been really stressful and i got a writing assignment that needs a lot of attention unfortunately.