butterfly lips。『 minjoon 』

five

》chapter five: the sadness drowned out the resentment《

★

THE morning greeted jimin with an awful throbbing pain, spreading through jimin's head in waves after waves. it squeezed and stabbed continuously into his brain. jimin wouldn't be surprised if he lost a couple of brain cells due to his drinking. he swallowed thickly, a disgusting taste lingering on his tongue. it was a nauseating blend of dryness, alcohol, and vomit, that was impossible to ignore and attacked his taste buds every time he breathed. it was enough for jimin to pull himself out of his bed. bed sheets thrown to the side as he jumped off. his legs wobbling a bit unsteadily on the floor. everything hurt, his muscles, his head, and... so did his heart. 

he felt a familiar wave of nausea. jimin held his hand over his mouth, picking up his pace to the bathroom. he flung the door shut, a hideous sound escaping his lips as he vomited into the toilet. the stomach acid burning his throat, it's bitter taste lingering too long on his tongue. he stayed in that position for a couple of minutes till he got enough out of his system. 

jimin washed his hand and splashed his face with water. he stared into the mirror as he was brushing his teeth. he nitpicked at every little flaw that he saw. his skin held a sickly hue to it and eyes had dark circles under them. his cheeks were hollow and lips chapped. he splashed his face with water a couple of times after he finished brushing his teeth. then began to gently scrub his face with facial wash. when he finished that, he applied a bit of concealer and lip balm. he made his way out to the kitchen, following the smell of hoseok's cooking. his eyes squinting at the amount of light pouring through the windows. he could barely see anything. this morning was so bright for no reason.

he plopped himself on a seat, covering his face with his hands. 

"oh, hoseok it's too fucking bright in here. i can barely think." jimin groaned, not feeling very happy or upbeat as he usually does in the mornings. probably because the alcohol did not erase last nights happenings and because he puked his guts out- as always now it seems. 

the other just laughed, shaking his head a bit but there was a worried frown on his lips that appeared quickly right after. he placed a warm cup of coffee right in front of him and jimin could almost kiss him. he grabbed the cup off coffee, careful not to burn his fingertips. he blew over the surface, taking a couple of sips from it and felt as the warm liquid traveled down his throat. he let out a sigh of relief. "thank you." 

"now, tell me. what's wrong? you nearly drank yourself silly yesterday. i mean, i know you are a pretty heavy drinker at times but yesterday wasn't normal at all." hoseok said, placing a plate in front of jimin before placing his own on the table, across from the other. he sat down on the chair, picking up his fork and knife. 

jimin stared at the strawberry pancakes, his mouth watering at the sight. he nearly didn't catch hoseok's questions and the moment he processed them, it immediately dampened his mood. he set his fork down, his brows knotting and he shook his head. "rather not talk about it. at least not right now, i'm really hungry." he stabbed into his pancakes and began to eat them, making sure not to leave anything behind after he finished. the entire time that they were both eating it was silent. somewhat uncomfortable but not enough to spoil the food. then once jimin finished, hoseok reached for his plate and cup. 

hoseok placed the plates in the sink, grabbing the sponge and then washing them quickly before placing them on the drying rack. he dried his hands, "do you want another cup of coffee?" he asked, looking back at jimin. 

"yeah... thank you." jimin rested his head on the table, his head still aching but not as badly when he first woke up. a thankful smile on his lips appeared when hoseok set the cup of coffee in front of him. he grabbed the cup, drinking it slowly. the burning liquid enough to send another spark of energy through him. 

hoseok took a sip from his coffee as well, staring at jimin with narrowed careful eyes, wondering what could be going on through his head. hoseok was not stupid at all. a soft sigh escaped his lips as he set the cup down, wanting to make sure that the words he was going to say wasn't going to drive jimin away.

"jimin... what's wrong? really... i tried not to ask to much about it... because i know you don't like it when i do. i can't it ignore it forever though. not when you have this look in your eye. like something bad happened." 

a tangle of emotions, mostly sadness and fear, pierced through jimin's chest like an arrow. it was hard for him to forever keep his emotions in but he planned to keep them in for longer. jimin looked at hoseok, a nervous smile on his lips as he shook his head. "hoseok, i'm fine." 

"when what was that commotion in your room a couple of nights ago? why did you drink yourself to the point of alcohol poisoning?"

jimin bit down on his trembling lip as he turned away. he got up but so did hoseok. the older man reached out to grab his hand. 

"jimin please answer me." 

"i found my soulmate." jimin turned to look at hoseok in the eye. 

"wh-" 

"it's namjoon."  jimin whispered out, his eyes stinging with tears and he couldn't stop them from trailing down his face.  

"oh... jiminie..." hoseok pushed the seat out of the way and immediately pulled jimin into a tight hug. jimin wrapped his arms around his waist, hiding his face into the juncture of hoseok's neck, his entire body trembling as he cried. 

jimin didn't feel the anger this time... he didn't feel the jealousy. no... all he felt was a deep, unfathomable sadness.