Elusive [Harry Styles]

15. Head Over Heels

~ Harry ~

I resisted badgering Emily for the whole weekend. It was Monday evening, and to say the least, I was bored. Having time off was great, but I didn't really have anything to do especially seeing as anything I did do was documented by the entire world. 

In the news right now was the fact that Zayn had made his first solo appearance since leaving the band; he'd attended the Annual Asian Awards in London a couple of days ago, and won an Award for 'Outstanding Contribution to Music'. There was still huge speculation as to why he left, and it was all anyone was talking about. I couldn't see how nobody had realised he just wasn't into One Direction anymore. It was sad for us as a band and to the fans that he'd lost interest in our music and was just a totally different person than he was when we first got together almost five years ago, but he just wasn't happy. Behind the scenes he was facing a lot of stress too, he and Perrie weren't on the best of terms and were arguing a lot because of his lifestyle and wanting to start fresh. It hurt as a friend, that over the years we'd become so close and built such  a great bond and he wanted to throw it all away. He'd left on pretty good terms, but still it felt like a bit of a stab in the back.

It was tough having to rearrange everything for tour and for our new music - without Zayn we were having to change things around and cover his parts of songs and routines, and in terms of new music we may as well just have scrapped it all and started again. Our management insisted that with Zayn having the power to leak our new stuff we'd just have to start again and throw some new ideas on the drawing board. I felt like Liam and I were doing most of the hard work, and Louis was just out being reckless and having fun. Niall was chipping in as much as he could but he was very focused on his golf and such, too. 

It feels weird that a lot of my life over the past five years has been so secretive. When I was younger and the band first formed I was daft and we were all so excited that we just shared everything, but these days nothing goes unnoticed so a lot of what happens in our lives no one even knows about. Fans and the media may think they know every aspect of our lives but to tell the truth, they don't. We're under strict orders and protection from Modest and our team and every day is like a top secret FBI mission, we have to think so carefully about every little thing we do. Don't get me wrong, I love being in One Direction and I adore the fans but it can get really tiresome. I'd be nothing without the fans but I can't deny my life has been altered forever. I always wonder what will happen when I'm sixty years old; will people still know my name? Will I still have to have a bodyguard to nip to the chemist and get my prescription? It's such a crazy life I live.

After a lot of pondering I decided the only way I could get out the house would be to cave and go and see Emily, and to be honest I just couldn't stay away. It was coming up to six o'clock so she'd be leaving work soon. I changed out of my joggers into some signature black skinny jeans and put on a light jacket since the weather wasn't looking too bad, throwing my hair up into a rough bun. I text Pete and asked him to come and pick me up and he was pulling up in the driveway only ten minutes later.

"Evening, Harry," I was greeted with a polite smile and laddish nod as I slid into the back seat.

"Hi Pete."

"Where are we off to?"

There was a pause. "Islington..." I said shyly.

Pete nodded knowingly, it was a bit embarrassing that he knew exactly where I was going and who would be there, but he respectfully didn't say anything. Thank God. I put on my seat belt and he pulled away onto the streets of Hampstead without hesitation, the gates shutting behind him. I was impressed by the ease in which he drove around London, which can be pretty mental, but I guess years of practise pays off. The drive was short and fairly silent, the two of us just exchanging odd small talk about this and that and the radio playing along quietly in the background. We arrived at the tall glass building which he knew to be Emily's office, looking back at me over his shoulder expectantly.