Chapter 9

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I saw that my parents-in-law had arrived. I went over to them and kissed their hands, like I had to. My father-in-law smiled and it was a real smile. I was shocked but smiled back. He patted my head but didn't say anything. My mother-in-law gave me her hand like I had some disease. She looked so much like my mother. Always a scolding face while looking at me.

Everyone was just busy with themselves. We were going to have a barbecue. When I was younger, I never liked them. The whole family would come over and I was the only one who was serving food, cleaning and washing the dishes. I have a lot of girl cousins but they never did anything when they came over to us. It was like my mother told them not to help me.

I went over to the kitchen where Aisha was and helped her with all the things she was doing. We talked and laughed a lot. I didn't know where Aneel was. Probably with my 'brother'. I was finishing the last ingredients of the salad when my mother-in-law came into the kitchen. She looked over at how I was doing it and I rolled my eyes mentally.

"Why did I have to have a daughter-in-law like her, Yarabbi, she can't even hold a knife" she said throwing her hands up. What was wrong with her? Is there a supposed way to hold a knife?

"Why not someone like Aisha here? Aisha, you are the fiancé of Ibrahim, right?" she asked. My head shot up, looking at her to get her intention. Did she want to take her as Aneel's wife or something? Yeah, over my dead body. I'm not his real wife but if they want each other, that happens when he is divorced with me. Aisha had the same expression as me.

"Yes. Why did you ask?" she asked. My mother-in-law just shook her head and went back to the living room.

"What the hell was that about?" she asked with a frown on her face.

"She probably thought you would want to be Aneel's wife. Or even second wife. He can't even handle one, how would he handle two" I said to myself, walking over to the sink to wash my hands. I stopped immediately when I realized what I had said.

"Sahra, look at me" Aisha said when she stopped with what she was doing. She turned me around and I looked down, not wanting to face her.

"Sahra, are you not happy? Did they force you?" she said. Happy.. That was a foreign feeling.

"It is nothing Aisha. I'm happy. No one forced me." I said. She didn't believe me, I could see it in her eyes. She came over and hugged me. Tears were streaming down and I was mad at myself that I cried in front of her.

"I'm going to talk to Ibrahim. You can't get in a forced marriage, in which century do we live?!" she said. That feeling of fear started coming again. Just when I thought I was freed from all the abuse, it was going to start again. I grabbed her arms, forcing her to stop. She looked me in the eyes and I put on a serious look.

"No. Don't ,Aisha. If you do that.." I said, not knowing what to say else. I couldn't tell her what they had done to me all these years.

"No, you listen Sahra. I don't know what is going on but I'm going to find out" Just when I was about to reply, my father came into the kitchen to tell us to set the table. We didn't say anything else to each other after that and that was bothering me.

When I cleaned everything, I went to the garden and sat on the swing. I looked at the sky. Everything was black, there were no stars. Just like my own mind. Everything was black in me. Nothing I could feel. Aisha's words haunted me. Happiness? What is that? Love? Things I would never feel. I sighed and was about to stand up when my brother came over to me. He looked furious and I was scared, scared of what he was going to do. I knew what he was going to do.

"Sahra!" he said while nearing towards me. I already took a step backwards.

"What the hell did you tell Aisha? Did you tell her what we did to you? Did you tell her about the beatings, about the forced marriage?" he said. I didn't say anything. I was too scared to talk, knowing that everything was about to start again. Me replying to them was always the start sign. The second I opened my mouth, was the moment they started everything. The pain, the fear- everything felt like how I was used to. It wasn't over, it was never.

"I asked you something so answer me! What did you tell Aisha about your messed up life?!" he asked again. Tears were streaming down my face. No, no don't. Please! I was praying in my head. I couldn't say anything. It was like someone was holding my throat. He raised his hand up and I closed my eyes. I knew what was going to come. I already felt the pain. Come on, what are you waiting for. Slap me! But no, I felt nothing. This was so foreign. It took always five seconds, yet this time it didn't start.

"Ibrahim, what the hell?!" I heard Aisha's voice. When I opened my eyes, I couldn't believe it. Aneel was holding Ibrahim's arm, blocking him from hurting me. He has his familiar angry face on and had his lips tight on each other. I looked over at Aisha, seeing her shocked eyes with fear dancing in them.

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Final Editing Done: 23-09-2016

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